I could talk all day on Katakana, but I will try not to. Katakana makes up half of the Japanese phonetic alphabet and is typically used to sound out words that are 'borrowed' from other languages. It comes in handy for sounding out foreign names as well. Some words make learning 'Japanese' seem like the easiest thing in the world. Other words make your brain want to leap out of your skull and punch the closest person in the face. It is a blessing, and a curse to the Japanese language. Here are a few easy to learn words to make you sound more fluent...followed by a few words that will pain you to speak because it sounds so ridiculous.
Pinku (ピンク): pink. Easy right?
Nyuusu (ニュース) : News. Like the kind on TV.
Gei (ゲイ): Gay. In the very homosexual sense of the word.
Kiro (キロ): Kilogram. Good to know since Japanese are smart enough to use metric.
Raisu (ライス): Rice. The cooked kind.
Karori- (カロリー): Calorie. Just because the word above reminded me.
Konpyu-ta- (コンピューター): Computer.
Biiru (ビール): Beer. A word you will never forget.
Now for the stupid ones...
Charenji (チャレンジ): Challenge. This is actually a very useful word in Japanese, but its meaning is a little off kilter. In this sense, you use challenge for when you try something new, or challenge yourself.
Fechi (フェチ): Besides the fact that it sounds like you’re giving your dog a command, this word is overly used in Japanese. It means fetish, but not necessarily the weird fetishes. You can use the word to describe anything you like about the opposite sex.
Manshon (マンション): What do you think this means? If you guessed small apartment, you’re absolutely correct.
Arerugi (アレルぎ): It took me saying this word 47 times to guess this one, so I’ll save you the trouble. Allergy.
Miruku (ミルク): Since when was milk a three syllable word? Seriously?
Kanningu (カンニング): Nope, not cunning. That would actually make sense. Instead it somehow means cheating. You pair it with the verb for ‘to do’ and it becomes to cheat. Class, don’t do the cunning during a test!
Metabo (メタボ): Possibly short for metabolism? Eh, you’re half right..ish. It is short for metabolic syndrome and means overweight. Some comedians have based their entire bit on this word.
Once you get over how stupid you sound saying English words like a toddler, Japanese will just open up for you. Katakana words, though kind of stupid, are the easiest to remember, so study up and learn this crucial element of the Japanese language.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Monday, December 27, 2010
More JET Fire
After expelling a lot of hate on the JET program, I decided to do a little more research and learn some more about this retarded program. I haven’t quite pinpointed the source of its failure, but I did find another JET with some stupid ideas and someone else who tries to let JET off the hook. So…maybe I was right in the first place.
Regarding this first JET, he has some ideas for helping teach English in Japan. His first idea being that Katakana should not be used in the classroom. While I do agree with this, he goes on to say that Roman characters (the kind you’re reading right now) can be used to represent Japanese sounds, but Katakana cannot be used to represent English….in this case, he is only half right.
They are not used to distinguishing the differences between R and L, because the closest thing they have is something in the middle.
As for GA, you can pretty much say it the way it is spelled and get away with it, but I have noticed that the Tokyo (standard) dialect tends to put a nasally sound at the front of GA, particularly when women say it. When they say it, it sounds more like nGA. These are just a couple examples where roman characters fall short of representing Japanese. So for all of you studying Japanese out there, read Japanese and do not settle for Romaji! You’ll only be hurting yourself. It only takes a few days to learn the phonetic alphabet anyway..
As for the second Article, it attempts at defending JET but JET just seems even more stupid after reading it. Debito Arutou points out that the E in JET does not even stand for English, JET’s main goal is not teaching English, and the ‘teachers’ are not qualified to teach. That sounds like a worthwhile program to me!
After bashing JET a bit, Debito goes on to make some very valid points. English classes in Japan are HORRIBLE, and it seems like everyone knows it but is too stubborn to change it. This is why English cafes are so popular, because Japanese are desperate to speak the language – an opportunity rarely given in an English class.
Language is also fluent and ever-changing. How do you tell if someone’s English is WRONG? Did they get the point across? If your dialect is different from the standard, does that make your version wrong? I'm pretty sure I made like, um, bout 20 grammer mistakes in this post alone. But you know what I'm talking about....right guys?
Regarding this first JET, he has some ideas for helping teach English in Japan. His first idea being that Katakana should not be used in the classroom. While I do agree with this, he goes on to say that Roman characters (the kind you’re reading right now) can be used to represent Japanese sounds, but Katakana cannot be used to represent English….in this case, he is only half right.
I am reminded of my days studying Japanese at UMD with a book 
written in the 80’s and entirely in English characters. Needless to say, I didn’t learn much from that book, because I wasn’t really reading Japanese. Losing Katakana and using more English would give Japanese kids more exposure to the language, and would likely help out in the long run but the idea of Romaji accurately representing Japanese is absolutely false. There is no way to use roman characters to represent all Japanese sounds, because English simply does not have those sounds.
Take らりるれろ and が for instance. In roman characters, they are written RA RI RU RE RO and GA respectively, but this is just as close as English can get to writing these sounds. For RA, the actual pronunciation is like a fusion of LA and RA while flicking your front teeth. This is why they are sometimes written LA LI LU LE LO, and also why Crown and Clown sound the same to many Japanese.
written in the 80’s and entirely in English characters. Needless to say, I didn’t learn much from that book, because I wasn’t really reading Japanese. Losing Katakana and using more English would give Japanese kids more exposure to the language, and would likely help out in the long run but the idea of Romaji accurately representing Japanese is absolutely false. There is no way to use roman characters to represent all Japanese sounds, because English simply does not have those sounds.Take らりるれろ and が for instance. In roman characters, they are written RA RI RU RE RO and GA respectively, but this is just as close as English can get to writing these sounds. For RA, the actual pronunciation is like a fusion of LA and RA while flicking your front teeth. This is why they are sometimes written LA LI LU LE LO, and also why Crown and Clown sound the same to many Japanese.
It is also why somebody thought this was a good idea.
They are not used to distinguishing the differences between R and L, because the closest thing they have is something in the middle.
As for GA, you can pretty much say it the way it is spelled and get away with it, but I have noticed that the Tokyo (standard) dialect tends to put a nasally sound at the front of GA, particularly when women say it. When they say it, it sounds more like nGA. These are just a couple examples where roman characters fall short of representing Japanese. So for all of you studying Japanese out there, read Japanese and do not settle for Romaji! You’ll only be hurting yourself. It only takes a few days to learn the phonetic alphabet anyway..
As for the second Article, it attempts at defending JET but JET just seems even more stupid after reading it. Debito Arutou points out that the E in JET does not even stand for English, JET’s main goal is not teaching English, and the ‘teachers’ are not qualified to teach. That sounds like a worthwhile program to me!
After bashing JET a bit, Debito goes on to make some very valid points. English classes in Japan are HORRIBLE, and it seems like everyone knows it but is too stubborn to change it. This is why English cafes are so popular, because Japanese are desperate to speak the language – an opportunity rarely given in an English class.
Language is also fluent and ever-changing. How do you tell if someone’s English is WRONG? Did they get the point across? If your dialect is different from the standard, does that make your version wrong? I'm pretty sure I made like, um, bout 20 grammer mistakes in this post alone. But you know what I'm talking about....right guys?
Saturday, December 25, 2010
JET
How does someone get to Japan? One option (typically a last option) is the JET Program. The JET (Japanese Exchange and Teaching) program is for lack of a better word…retarded. Let me clarify. The idea of the JET program is great, but the problem is that it is run in such a terrible manner, that nobody benefits. The idea is to send native English speakers to Japan to teach English the way it is naturally spoken. I’ll list their problems in list format from here on out because thinking about JET makes me too angry to form a complete thought.
JET only hires morons. From my many friends and acquaintances that have applied for JET there has been a common theme to the ones that were accepted. Those ‘qualified’ to teach could barely locate Japan on a map and had little to no knowledge of Japanese culture outside of Anime. The only educational requirement for JET is that your native language be English and you have a Bachelor's Degree in 'something'. It is a running joke that you should wear an Evangelion T-shirt to you interview to improve your odds of getting accepted (for the longest time I thought JET stood for Jackasses in Evangelion T-shirts). It is never spoken of openly, but JET fears charismatic, intelligent teachers (who can actually speak Japanese) because they can easily leave the program and get another, better, job in Japan. The less you know about Japan and Japanese, the less likely you are to jump their ship.
You can only be in JET for 5 years. This probably has something to do with the number of applicants they get or the fact that they want young, energetic people for their program but it seems more likely that they just want younger folks who will put up with JET's BS and not ask too many questions (being under 40 is an application requirement). You typically sign a one year contract and have to renew it every year you wish to continue. It almost seems like once you get the position you are fighting for your life to keep it. This is a dumb system because once you get the hang of teaching English, they kick you out and some other idiot has to learn from scratch. The kids get inexperienced teachers over and over again, and learn little English as a result.
You will likely get placed in the middle of nowhere. This is not really the JET program’s fault. So many people sign up for JET and want to be in Tokyo, Osaka, Kyoto, and other key cities, but there are just not as many open spaces in these cities as there are applicants. Picking your top 3 cities you want to be located in is part of the application process, but you rarely get any of those locations. Odds are if you do get accepted into JET, you will be in some unknown city with a population of around 100 people. I know some folks that were put in this situation and had to take a bus and train for 2 hours to get to somewhere that had convenience stores. Getting placed in the middle of nowhere also has the added inconvenience of learning non-standard (incomprehensible) Japanese.
There are many different types of English. This isn't so much of a 'problem' but have you ever heard a Japanese person speak English with an Australian accent?? It'll blow your freakin mind!! To add to that, what the hell is rubbish? The word is trash!
Me Hate JET! I think a lot of my excessive, and possibly misguided, hate comes from actually seeing the JET program and it's participants in action. The JETs in Japan are very cliquey. They only hang out with other JETs and only speak English. I met some JETs that lived in Japan for 4 years and could only order noodles in Japanese. You'll also notice that well spoken English is hard to find in Japan.
If you are a decent human being who has a fondness for Japan, you have an uphill battle getting accepted by JET. If you do in fact get accepted, and don’t mind the bureaucratic bull crap, then power to ya, and enjoy those next 5 years! You deserve it!
JET only hires morons. From my many friends and acquaintances that have applied for JET there has been a common theme to the ones that were accepted. Those ‘qualified’ to teach could barely locate Japan on a map and had little to no knowledge of Japanese culture outside of Anime. The only educational requirement for JET is that your native language be English and you have a Bachelor's Degree in 'something'. It is a running joke that you should wear an Evangelion T-shirt to you interview to improve your odds of getting accepted (for the longest time I thought JET stood for Jackasses in Evangelion T-shirts). It is never spoken of openly, but JET fears charismatic, intelligent teachers (who can actually speak Japanese) because they can easily leave the program and get another, better, job in Japan. The less you know about Japan and Japanese, the less likely you are to jump their ship.
You can only be in JET for 5 years. This probably has something to do with the number of applicants they get or the fact that they want young, energetic people for their program but it seems more likely that they just want younger folks who will put up with JET's BS and not ask too many questions (being under 40 is an application requirement). You typically sign a one year contract and have to renew it every year you wish to continue. It almost seems like once you get the position you are fighting for your life to keep it. This is a dumb system because once you get the hang of teaching English, they kick you out and some other idiot has to learn from scratch. The kids get inexperienced teachers over and over again, and learn little English as a result.
You will likely get placed in the middle of nowhere. This is not really the JET program’s fault. So many people sign up for JET and want to be in Tokyo, Osaka, Kyoto, and other key cities, but there are just not as many open spaces in these cities as there are applicants. Picking your top 3 cities you want to be located in is part of the application process, but you rarely get any of those locations. Odds are if you do get accepted into JET, you will be in some unknown city with a population of around 100 people. I know some folks that were put in this situation and had to take a bus and train for 2 hours to get to somewhere that had convenience stores. Getting placed in the middle of nowhere also has the added inconvenience of learning non-standard (incomprehensible) Japanese.
There are many different types of English. This isn't so much of a 'problem' but have you ever heard a Japanese person speak English with an Australian accent?? It'll blow your freakin mind!! To add to that, what the hell is rubbish? The word is trash!
Me Hate JET! I think a lot of my excessive, and possibly misguided, hate comes from actually seeing the JET program and it's participants in action. The JETs in Japan are very cliquey. They only hang out with other JETs and only speak English. I met some JETs that lived in Japan for 4 years and could only order noodles in Japanese. You'll also notice that well spoken English is hard to find in Japan.
If you are a decent human being who has a fondness for Japan, you have an uphill battle getting accepted by JET. If you do in fact get accepted, and don’t mind the bureaucratic bull crap, then power to ya, and enjoy those next 5 years! You deserve it!
But you certainly have your work cut out for you. MANY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!
Monday, December 20, 2010
Hikikomori
Oh no!!! According to the Japanese news, incidents of Hikikomori have reached a national crisis!!
National Crisis?? Really??
First let me clarify what Hikikomori is. Its this phenomenon where people, typically younger men, shut themselves in their rooms for years and never leave. It would be complete isolation if it weren't for the fact that many hikikomori spend hours a day on the computer. They are usually supported by their parents financially and even have food brought to their room. I have also heard of Hikikomori that have locked themselves in the kitchen.
America has this same group of people, but they're not called hikikomori. They're called Gamers/WOW players, virgins or Lazy. I think 'National Crisis' might be overstating this situation just a bit. The problem is that Japan is a nation of copy cats. This probably has something to do with their group mentality. I've noticed that when anything happens in Japan, whether its a kid never leaving his room for 5 years or a crazy person's stabbing spree in a train station, there are swarms of copy cats after. Maybe its a way to get attention or just the fact that one person does it makes people think its okay.
True, Japan (like other Asian countries) imposes a lot of social pressure on its citizens. But Japan also has beer/liquor vending machines and legal happy endings. Trust me, life in Japan is not that stressful. I do have a different perspective though, because being a foreigner means less pressure to be Japanese (i.e. work your ass off to be accepted by Japan).
Its also very possible the Japanese media is just blowing a situation completely out of proportion, as always...false alarm folks
National Crisis?? Really??
First let me clarify what Hikikomori is. Its this phenomenon where people, typically younger men, shut themselves in their rooms for years and never leave. It would be complete isolation if it weren't for the fact that many hikikomori spend hours a day on the computer. They are usually supported by their parents financially and even have food brought to their room. I have also heard of Hikikomori that have locked themselves in the kitchen.
America has this same group of people, but they're not called hikikomori. They're called Gamers/WOW players, virgins or Lazy. I think 'National Crisis' might be overstating this situation just a bit. The problem is that Japan is a nation of copy cats. This probably has something to do with their group mentality. I've noticed that when anything happens in Japan, whether its a kid never leaving his room for 5 years or a crazy person's stabbing spree in a train station, there are swarms of copy cats after. Maybe its a way to get attention or just the fact that one person does it makes people think its okay.
True, Japan (like other Asian countries) imposes a lot of social pressure on its citizens. But Japan also has beer/liquor vending machines and legal happy endings. Trust me, life in Japan is not that stressful. I do have a different perspective though, because being a foreigner means less pressure to be Japanese (i.e. work your ass off to be accepted by Japan).
Its also very possible the Japanese media is just blowing a situation completely out of proportion, as always...false alarm folks
Thursday, December 16, 2010
ドンキホーテ
For those of you unfamiliar, Don Quixote is a staple of Japan (actually, I think there is one in Hawaii too). It's like a Wal-mart...without the evil.
This store is absolute magic. I’ve seen them in Tokyo, Hirakata, Downtown Osaka…they’re everywhere. I love this place because it is an interesting combination of boardwalk crap store, grocery store, and circuit city all in one. Seriously, whatever you need, you can find there. I’ve used this fine establishment to buy stuff ranging from laundry detergent, cup noodles, cologne, helmets, and even seifuku.
They don’t just sell cheap stuff either. They sell designer sunglasses, bags, jewelry, you name it. You could walk out of Don Quixote paying anything from 100 to 200,000 円 for a single item. That’s why I love it! Unlike Wal-mart in America which is home to the worst human beings on the planet, Don Quixote has something for all the normal people out there. Go ahead and check it out.
I gotta say, I’m partial to the seifuku section. Of course, you would expect a store with the website DONKI.COM to have a good selection of this kind of stuff. A lot of my friends used it to do their Halloween shopping too, since Halloween isn't very big in Japan. If you can’t find something to fit your tastes at Don Quixote, you should probably be in prison. They were even selling a nazi uniform for a while...if you're in to that sort of thing...
The jingle is not too shabby either. Okay, the jingle is a little dumb,
but I guarantee you'll be singing it for the next three days after listening to it. Actually, the whole point of me writing this post is because I can't get this song out of my friggin head!
Keep a good eye out for Don Quixote (ドンキホーテ) and its pimptastic penguin.
This store is absolute magic. I’ve seen them in Tokyo, Hirakata, Downtown Osaka…they’re everywhere. I love this place because it is an interesting combination of boardwalk crap store, grocery store, and circuit city all in one. Seriously, whatever you need, you can find there. I’ve used this fine establishment to buy stuff ranging from laundry detergent, cup noodles, cologne, helmets, and even seifuku.
They don’t just sell cheap stuff either. They sell designer sunglasses, bags, jewelry, you name it. You could walk out of Don Quixote paying anything from 100 to 200,000 円 for a single item. That’s why I love it! Unlike Wal-mart in America which is home to the worst human beings on the planet, Don Quixote has something for all the normal people out there. Go ahead and check it out.
I gotta say, I’m partial to the seifuku section. Of course, you would expect a store with the website DONKI.COM to have a good selection of this kind of stuff. A lot of my friends used it to do their Halloween shopping too, since Halloween isn't very big in Japan. If you can’t find something to fit your tastes at Don Quixote, you should probably be in prison. They were even selling a nazi uniform for a while...if you're in to that sort of thing...
The jingle is not too shabby either. Okay, the jingle is a little dumb,
but I guarantee you'll be singing it for the next three days after listening to it. Actually, the whole point of me writing this post is because I can't get this song out of my friggin head!Keep a good eye out for Don Quixote (ドンキホーテ) and its pimptastic penguin.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Two Types of Women
Here's a little gem of information for you.
This is a running theory some friends and I have about women in Japan... This theory was not just developed over night, its been time tested so don't disregard it too quickly. There are two types of women (or maybe I should say girls, haven't really tested this on the above 25 crowd) , and they are Kobukuro girls, and Exile girls.
Kobukuro girls, if you haven't already guessed after clicking the link, are the kind of girls you would like to take home to your family. These girls are typically smart, a little shy, respond well to compliments, and can usually see through your B.S. so get your game face on if you're just trying to pick them up. Oh, and they like Kobukuro - hence the name.
Exile girls are on the other end of the spectrum. These are the kind of girls that you wouldn't really want to take home...A love hotel would be more appropriate. They are fun to be around, far from shy, and easy to talk to (though the conversation may be stupid). Karaoke is way more fun with Exile girls.
To simplify, think of life as a horror movie. Is the girl you're talking to going to survive till the next 3 sequels?? She's probably a Kobukuro girl. Is she going to get drunk, show some skin and then get stabbed 3 minutes into the movie?? Exile girl.
Still not sure which kind of girl you're talking to? Have a buddy bring up that he likes either Exile or Kobukuro. If she agrees, you know what you're dealing with. If she disagrees, just creep on in and say you like the other group and get your keitai ready, cause you're about to get a phone number. Its that easy.
This is a running theory some friends and I have about women in Japan... This theory was not just developed over night, its been time tested so don't disregard it too quickly. There are two types of women (or maybe I should say girls, haven't really tested this on the above 25 crowd) , and they are Kobukuro girls, and Exile girls.
Kobukuro girls, if you haven't already guessed after clicking the link, are the kind of girls you would like to take home to your family. These girls are typically smart, a little shy, respond well to compliments, and can usually see through your B.S. so get your game face on if you're just trying to pick them up. Oh, and they like Kobukuro - hence the name.
Exile girls are on the other end of the spectrum. These are the kind of girls that you wouldn't really want to take home...A love hotel would be more appropriate. They are fun to be around, far from shy, and easy to talk to (though the conversation may be stupid). Karaoke is way more fun with Exile girls.
Can you identify the Kobukuro and Exile girls??
Trick question, they are all exile girls.To simplify, think of life as a horror movie. Is the girl you're talking to going to survive till the next 3 sequels?? She's probably a Kobukuro girl. Is she going to get drunk, show some skin and then get stabbed 3 minutes into the movie?? Exile girl.
Still not sure which kind of girl you're talking to? Have a buddy bring up that he likes either Exile or Kobukuro. If she agrees, you know what you're dealing with. If she disagrees, just creep on in and say you like the other group and get your keitai ready, cause you're about to get a phone number. Its that easy.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Space
One of the most knee jerk responses from American's when talking about Japan seems to be "I couldn't live like that. I need my car and I need space." And if you live in America, I can completely understand this. You absolutely need a car to get anywhere important and you need some space to get away from all the jerk-faces that populate America. In Japan, however, neither a car nor space is required...or wanted.
Keep in mind that there are about 127 million people in Japan, which is
about 145K square miles. America is about 300 million people in 3.8 million square miles, so Japan has around 11 times as many people per square mile. All that basically means is there is no space to screw around with and waste on frivolous things (like cars).
This may be one of those chicken and the egg things but Japanese people also don't seem to want a large home and especially don't want to own one. If they do own one they usually didn't get around to buying their home till their 30's or later. Renting a small apartment seems to be the way to go.
This article I came across describes the living conditions quite well. Living spaces in Japan are certainly 'small' by American standards, but they are by no means inadequate. There is plenty of space to eat, sleep, and cook. If you are not lazy and you fold up your futon every morning, you get an additional 25+ square feet of floor space! Throwing a party is difficult if you plan on inviting more than 4 people, but that is what Izakayas are for. There are a variety of izakaya to choose from, and many have private rooms if you're still concerned about your privacy.
The showers do tend to be a little tiny in apartments, but take a quick stroll over to the water hotel and enjoy a shower the size of a master bedroom. Apartment size also seems to be a matter of priorities. Keep in mind that salarymen work insane hours, so they only need a place to sleep anyway.
For those of you who still find the idea of living in a 400 sf apartment difficult, don't worry. Life in Japan changes you, usually for the better. Once you get over there you'll find yourself wanting to be outside, and you won't have time to worry about the size of your apartment. By the time you stumble back to your place you'll be too hammered to even notice, trust me.
Keep in mind that there are about 127 million people in Japan, which is
about 145K square miles. America is about 300 million people in 3.8 million square miles, so Japan has around 11 times as many people per square mile. All that basically means is there is no space to screw around with and waste on frivolous things (like cars).This may be one of those chicken and the egg things but Japanese people also don't seem to want a large home and especially don't want to own one. If they do own one they usually didn't get around to buying their home till their 30's or later. Renting a small apartment seems to be the way to go.
This article I came across describes the living conditions quite well. Living spaces in Japan are certainly 'small' by American standards, but they are by no means inadequate. There is plenty of space to eat, sleep, and cook. If you are not lazy and you fold up your futon every morning, you get an additional 25+ square feet of floor space! Throwing a party is difficult if you plan on inviting more than 4 people, but that is what Izakayas are for. There are a variety of izakaya to choose from, and many have private rooms if you're still concerned about your privacy.
The showers do tend to be a little tiny in apartments, but take a quick stroll over to the water hotel and enjoy a shower the size of a master bedroom. Apartment size also seems to be a matter of priorities. Keep in mind that salarymen work insane hours, so they only need a place to sleep anyway.For those of you who still find the idea of living in a 400 sf apartment difficult, don't worry. Life in Japan changes you, usually for the better. Once you get over there you'll find yourself wanting to be outside, and you won't have time to worry about the size of your apartment. By the time you stumble back to your place you'll be too hammered to even notice, trust me.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
日本 Stuff
Name 3 things that are Japanese....GO!
...odds are, you mentioned Sake (お酒). You probably also mentioned kimchi and Jackie Chan, you freakin' racist!
Like other wine, there are TONS of different types of sake. The kind of sake varies depending on type of rice used, how it is milled, weather conditions, and hundreds of other factors. I am just now learning the names of a few types that I like.
Also like other wine, there are many different pairing options depending on your dish. A recent article describes a new trend of pairing sake with all kinds of food, including western cuisine. Unfortunately, if you have ordered Sake at a Japanese restaurant in America, they likely brought you some generic warm bottle of decent sake. This is often misleading though because you have many choices of sake.
Or you can just take what's in the vending machine!
If you are unfamiliar with Sake, or only had it in a Japanese steakhouse, allow me to recommend Nigorizake. Nigori (濁り) type sake is the easiest to spot because it is cloudy. It is also quite sweet and easy to drink. I prefer this type cold, not hot. If you don't like this type, sake is probably not for you. If you love this stuff, branch out and try the more dry or fruitier types to see what works best for you. There are so many types that it would be near impossible to dislike them all.
The sake to the left is Daiginjo, not Nigori, but still very very tasty. When I first started taking sake drinking seriously (for reasons other than just getting hammered) I bought these convenient little bottles so I didn't have to commit to something that I might not like.
...odds are, you mentioned Sake (お酒). You probably also mentioned kimchi and Jackie Chan, you freakin' racist!
Like other wine, there are TONS of different types of sake. The kind of sake varies depending on type of rice used, how it is milled, weather conditions, and hundreds of other factors. I am just now learning the names of a few types that I like.
Also like other wine, there are many different pairing options depending on your dish. A recent article describes a new trend of pairing sake with all kinds of food, including western cuisine. Unfortunately, if you have ordered Sake at a Japanese restaurant in America, they likely brought you some generic warm bottle of decent sake. This is often misleading though because you have many choices of sake.
Or you can just take what's in the vending machine!
If you are unfamiliar with Sake, or only had it in a Japanese steakhouse, allow me to recommend Nigorizake. Nigori (濁り) type sake is the easiest to spot because it is cloudy. It is also quite sweet and easy to drink. I prefer this type cold, not hot. If you don't like this type, sake is probably not for you. If you love this stuff, branch out and try the more dry or fruitier types to see what works best for you. There are so many types that it would be near impossible to dislike them all.
The sake to the left is Daiginjo, not Nigori, but still very very tasty. When I first started taking sake drinking seriously (for reasons other than just getting hammered) I bought these convenient little bottles so I didn't have to commit to something that I might not like.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Where's the rabu?
Here is a quick bit of disturbing information. Many marriages in Japan are sexless.
Really Evans?
Word.
What about all that kinky stuff we see in Japan, and all of the gorgeous women that make me feel tingly?
That is a great question to which I have no good answer to. This seems a bit surprising to me too, but a study was conducted and more than a third of the people asked did not have sex with their spouse for more than a year! That's like 3 million years in Evans time.
This is not to say that these couples are not having sex, they just aren't doing it with each other. In one of my first few weeks in Japan, some buddies and I wandered in to a place we thought was a maid cafe. It turns out, it was much more than that. This place offered a more 'expensive' service and gave you the option of paying extra to have the girl dress up in different costumes. After asking at the front desk what this place was, a large group of salarymen stumbled in and they were obviously hammered. Just so we were sure, we asked these drunk fools what this place did and they gave us the skinny, complete with hand gestures and sound effects (my favorite quote of the night had to be when they tried to explain it in english. "This is where they do the dicking." Freaking Priceless!)
Once we came out of shock that such a beautiful establishment exists, we started conversing with the salarymen. Turns out, most of them had wives...and kids. Go figure? These married men were just out enjoying a night with their coworkers and it didn't seem to phase them that they were about to pay hundreds of dollars for something they could get at home... Needless to say, that was the best team building exercise I had ever seen.
Really Evans?
Word.
What about all that kinky stuff we see in Japan, and all of the gorgeous women that make me feel tingly?
That is a great question to which I have no good answer to. This seems a bit surprising to me too, but a study was conducted and more than a third of the people asked did not have sex with their spouse for more than a year! That's like 3 million years in Evans time.
This is not to say that these couples are not having sex, they just aren't doing it with each other. In one of my first few weeks in Japan, some buddies and I wandered in to a place we thought was a maid cafe. It turns out, it was much more than that. This place offered a more 'expensive' service and gave you the option of paying extra to have the girl dress up in different costumes. After asking at the front desk what this place was, a large group of salarymen stumbled in and they were obviously hammered. Just so we were sure, we asked these drunk fools what this place did and they gave us the skinny, complete with hand gestures and sound effects (my favorite quote of the night had to be when they tried to explain it in english. "This is where they do the dicking." Freaking Priceless!)
Once we came out of shock that such a beautiful establishment exists, we started conversing with the salarymen. Turns out, most of them had wives...and kids. Go figure? These married men were just out enjoying a night with their coworkers and it didn't seem to phase them that they were about to pay hundreds of dollars for something they could get at home... Needless to say, that was the best team building exercise I had ever seen.
Sunday, November 28, 2010
The art of being オシャレ
Word on the street is that Japan is trying to 'export' its fashion overseas. Stores 
like Uniqlo are popping up all over the globe, and this is hopefully just the beginning. FYI, Uniqlo has some sweet robes. Japan is finally realizing they have sweet fashion, and they are looking to profit from this. So help me, if Gyaru makes its way to America (and the ladies here drop a few pounds), I might go back to white girls...
Japan making money from its cool?? How sweet would that be? That’s like getting a job eating onigiri senbei or drinking chu-hai. Japan eats, sleeps, and breathes fashion. Its no surprise that Tokyo is one of the top fashion capitols of the freakin WORLD! It comes so naturally to Japan that if they pull this off, it will be amazing.
Unfortunately for Japan, this may be a tall order. If you’ve never been to Japan, the only fashion news you hear about is the weird stuff. Men dressing as maids; the weirdos on harajuku bridge, visual K, Lolita, etc. This kind of fashion is what us foreigners hear about first. I blame that Gwen Stefani tart for tricking us into thinking harajuku fashion is cool. I have 'no doubt' that she is a moron.
Harajuku: Japanese for WTF
If you have been to Japan, you'll know that people who dress like that, are also douches in Japan. There are just as many Japanese people as tourists taking pictures and eye balling the those goth lolitas. You will also notice that everyone in Japan spends more than 5 minutes on getting ready in the morning. I hope Japan exports this little tid bit as well.
Now that I'm done ragging on the odd 'styles', some of the best include:
Gyaru (of course), hippy, anything with stockings, and I can even get behind the latest Yama Garu. These Yama Garu (mountain girls) try to pretty up functional hiking gear and head for the mountains.
Nice! I'll be grabbing my short shorts and heading for the moun...screw it. I'll just take more pictures in Uniqlo...
like Uniqlo are popping up all over the globe, and this is hopefully just the beginning. FYI, Uniqlo has some sweet robes. Japan is finally realizing they have sweet fashion, and they are looking to profit from this. So help me, if Gyaru makes its way to America (and the ladies here drop a few pounds), I might go back to white girls...Japan making money from its cool?? How sweet would that be? That’s like getting a job eating onigiri senbei or drinking chu-hai. Japan eats, sleeps, and breathes fashion. Its no surprise that Tokyo is one of the top fashion capitols of the freakin WORLD! It comes so naturally to Japan that if they pull this off, it will be amazing.
Unfortunately for Japan, this may be a tall order. If you’ve never been to Japan, the only fashion news you hear about is the weird stuff. Men dressing as maids; the weirdos on harajuku bridge, visual K, Lolita, etc. This kind of fashion is what us foreigners hear about first. I blame that Gwen Stefani tart for tricking us into thinking harajuku fashion is cool. I have 'no doubt' that she is a moron.
Harajuku: Japanese for WTF
If you have been to Japan, you'll know that people who dress like that, are also douches in Japan. There are just as many Japanese people as tourists taking pictures and eye balling the those goth lolitas. You will also notice that everyone in Japan spends more than 5 minutes on getting ready in the morning. I hope Japan exports this little tid bit as well.
Now that I'm done ragging on the odd 'styles', some of the best include:
Gyaru (of course), hippy, anything with stockings, and I can even get behind the latest Yama Garu. These Yama Garu (mountain girls) try to pretty up functional hiking gear and head for the mountains.
Nice! I'll be grabbing my short shorts and heading for the moun...screw it. I'll just take more pictures in Uniqlo...
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Baseball
When it comes to baseball, nobody takes this boring game more seriously than Japan. Okay, arguably America is reigning king of boring games, but Japan is a very close second. The Hanshin Tigers get a pretty decent turnout. At the games, it seems like the fans care more about the cheering than the game itself. Go to the games and check it out!! Many fans are too concerned with leading the cheers to even turn around and watch the game. Its wild.
In case you haven't heard, a new lady star has come to the U.S. - 吉田 えり (Yoshida Eri). Please, reserve your knuckle princess jokes. Its no surprise that Japan has another prodigy coming to America. The amount of practice time that those kids put in to sports is disgusting. By disgusting I mean I feel disgusting after watching them practice, because I have never practiced that hard for anything in my life. Some kids throw their arms out at 18 years old. I guess the point here is that this lady could make baseball watchable, so keep your eye out for Yoshida Eri of the Chico Outlaws and her sick knuckle-ball.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Speaking of Movies...
I know that in the US people have been complaining about movie tickets for a while now. Especially when talking about seeing a 3D movie, the tickets can seem expensive. They're even more expensive if you're wasting your extra 3D money on a movie like Clash of the Titans or The Last Airbender...
Anyone want to take a stab at what a movie ticket costs in Japan?? Think really hard and remember that anything you like to do in America is ridiculously expensive in Japan. Here is a list of 'American' things and their prices in Japan. Reading it should give you some time to guess ticket prices.
Driving: $3000 for a license and about $4.25 per gallon of gas.
Pizza: Around $30 to $40 for a large pizza with a few toppings.
Potato Chips: Typically $3+ for a bag half the size of what they sell in American grocery stores.
Beer: About $25 for a 12 pack...if you can find a 12 pack.
Getting the idea? The crap you get used to in America is not exactly popular in Japan, so it gets expensive. People don't typically have pizza delivered in Japan, and potato chips are usually only eaten with friends at some sort of drinking party. There is a heavy tax on Beer which is why many people drink Happoshu, myself included.
As for driving, roads and parking are just not an efficient use of space or energy, so if you want this privilege, you REALLY have to pay for it. Parking in Japan is similar to that of New York, its expensive and just plain difficult to find a space.
So the typical movie price in Japan is......1800 Yen!! Thats $21.50 with today's exchange rate. Add in the fact that the movie is 3D, and that becomes $30 dollars. Insane right?? Most theaters will offer some sort of student discount, but that doesn't knock the price in to the reasonable range by any means. Plus, if you are only traveling to Japan for a few months, there won't be many blockbuster movies out that you haven't already seen. There tends to be a lag time for big American movies to get to Japan, but some exceptions to the rule include Spider-man and I Am Legend which released the same day or earlier than America.
Something interesting to note about movie theaters in Japan, they tend to have cheaper ticket prices in the evening. This is quite the opposite case in America, but one reason is that people don't want to risk catching the last train in Japan, so an earlier movie is better.
So the next time you plan on seeing a movie in Japan....don't. Rent it when it comes out at Tsutaya, save 20 dollars and use that money to go out drinking with some buddies. You know what I always say, you learn more Japanese being blitzed out of your mind than from any movie...
Pictured: Fluency
Anyone want to take a stab at what a movie ticket costs in Japan?? Think really hard and remember that anything you like to do in America is ridiculously expensive in Japan. Here is a list of 'American' things and their prices in Japan. Reading it should give you some time to guess ticket prices.
Driving: $3000 for a license and about $4.25 per gallon of gas.
Pizza: Around $30 to $40 for a large pizza with a few toppings.
Potato Chips: Typically $3+ for a bag half the size of what they sell in American grocery stores.
Beer: About $25 for a 12 pack...if you can find a 12 pack.
Getting the idea? The crap you get used to in America is not exactly popular in Japan, so it gets expensive. People don't typically have pizza delivered in Japan, and potato chips are usually only eaten with friends at some sort of drinking party. There is a heavy tax on Beer which is why many people drink Happoshu, myself included.
As for driving, roads and parking are just not an efficient use of space or energy, so if you want this privilege, you REALLY have to pay for it. Parking in Japan is similar to that of New York, its expensive and just plain difficult to find a space.
So the typical movie price in Japan is......1800 Yen!! Thats $21.50 with today's exchange rate. Add in the fact that the movie is 3D, and that becomes $30 dollars. Insane right?? Most theaters will offer some sort of student discount, but that doesn't knock the price in to the reasonable range by any means. Plus, if you are only traveling to Japan for a few months, there won't be many blockbuster movies out that you haven't already seen. There tends to be a lag time for big American movies to get to Japan, but some exceptions to the rule include Spider-man and I Am Legend which released the same day or earlier than America.
Something interesting to note about movie theaters in Japan, they tend to have cheaper ticket prices in the evening. This is quite the opposite case in America, but one reason is that people don't want to risk catching the last train in Japan, so an earlier movie is better.
So the next time you plan on seeing a movie in Japan....don't. Rent it when it comes out at Tsutaya, save 20 dollars and use that money to go out drinking with some buddies. You know what I always say, you learn more Japanese being blitzed out of your mind than from any movie...
Pictured: Fluency
Sunday, November 21, 2010
MOVIES
It's been a little while since I've mentioned some good Japanese movies. That is probably because good current Japanese movies are few and far between (but you can't go wrong with anything by Kurosawa, Beat Takeshi and Studio Ghibli). Here are some goodies from 3 major Japanese movie categories, Action, Drama, and Weird.
Action: Azumi 2 or Ichi. You really only need to watch one of these, cause they are essentially the same movie. Both movies consist of Japanese women killing lots of people with swords. The only difference is that Ichi is blind (fun fact: the japanese word for blind, mekura, is considered kind of rude to say, so you don't hear it often. You typically hear 'me ga mienai'. Translation: eyes can't see)
Drama: Casshern. If you feel like being super depressed and hating all of humanity, watch this movie. Its filmed in the style of 300 but takes place in the future. There is a lot of martial arts and war action, but the story is mainly about how human beings are terrible. I love this movie and the soundtrack is awesome but you just have to be in the mood to watch this sort of thing.
Weird: Revenge of the Zebra Miniskirt Police. Dead or Alive, Visitor Q. If the names alone aren't weird enough, give these movies a try. Dead or alive actually starts like a normal crime/gang movie yet in the end everything falls apart. Visitor Q is something a retired porn star taking LSD might come up with so don't watch this with family.
Now that I've written this I've thought of a few more goodies - so stay tuned for more recommendations.
Action: Azumi 2 or Ichi. You really only need to watch one of these, cause they are essentially the same movie. Both movies consist of Japanese women killing lots of people with swords. The only difference is that Ichi is blind (fun fact: the japanese word for blind, mekura, is considered kind of rude to say, so you don't hear it often. You typically hear 'me ga mienai'. Translation: eyes can't see)
Drama: Casshern. If you feel like being super depressed and hating all of humanity, watch this movie. Its filmed in the style of 300 but takes place in the future. There is a lot of martial arts and war action, but the story is mainly about how human beings are terrible. I love this movie and the soundtrack is awesome but you just have to be in the mood to watch this sort of thing.
Weird: Revenge of the Zebra Miniskirt Police. Dead or Alive, Visitor Q. If the names alone aren't weird enough, give these movies a try. Dead or alive actually starts like a normal crime/gang movie yet in the end everything falls apart. Visitor Q is something a retired porn star taking LSD might come up with so don't watch this with family.
Now that I've written this I've thought of a few more goodies - so stay tuned for more recommendations.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Japanese Frustration
Part of what makes Japan an amazing country, is the fact that it has become so technologically advanced and industrialized while maintaining much of its culture and traditional values.
However, at times this becomes incredibly frustrating to witness, especially when you come from a country that has thrown traditional values out the window and every idiot can speak their mind (that was meant to be a compliment to America).
Here are some examples to help explain what I'm talking about.
Some friends and I stopped in at a Yoshinoya in Nanba before a night of awesome. I saw that they sold Kimchi-don (a beef and rice bowl with kimchi on top), so I knew they had kimchi and rice, and we asked if I could just have a kimchi and rice bowl. That is a reasonable request by American standards, but apparently not by Japanese standards. They said no, even when I said I would pay the price of a normal kimchi-don.
Here's another example. In America (and in my mind) drug use is not that big of a deal. I don't mean that getting strung out on heroine or cocaine is cool, I just mean that its possible for someone to try drugs and still be a good person. Everything in moderation. In Japan, I've found that people look down on users like they are the scum of the earth. That is just a tad bit hypocritical coming from people with such a large smoking population and drinking culture...and a growing population with aids...it doesn't sound like they have their priorities straight, does it? A recent study estimates drug use at just 2.9% of the Japanese population . For comparison, in 2007, 8% of persons 12 years of age and over in America had used illicit drugs in the past month. Japan really hates drugs. Meanwhile California loves drugs but they just can't leave their bongs long enough to go vote on the issue...
Last, but certainly not least, is the excuse of tradition. When I asked why people in Shiga still make nasty fermented fish that tastes disgusting for 1000 years, the response I got was 'its tradition'. For those of you that have seen The Cove, the dolphin kill is an age old tradition as well, but I will have to elaborate on that at a later date. Apparently it doesn't matter if the tradition is gross, outdated, or barbaric. The fact that its tradition is all the justification needed to continue year after year. Seriously, trying to get an answer more detailed than 'its tradition' from a Japanese person is like pulling teeth...from a dolphin while its getting stabbed repeatedly in the face.
I love Japan, and I know the reason Japan has such a rich and beautiful culture is because they stick to their traditions with such conviction. I just wish that sometimes they would let the dumb traditions slide...
However, at times this becomes incredibly frustrating to witness, especially when you come from a country that has thrown traditional values out the window and every idiot can speak their mind (that was meant to be a compliment to America).
Here are some examples to help explain what I'm talking about.
Some friends and I stopped in at a Yoshinoya in Nanba before a night of awesome. I saw that they sold Kimchi-don (a beef and rice bowl with kimchi on top), so I knew they had kimchi and rice, and we asked if I could just have a kimchi and rice bowl. That is a reasonable request by American standards, but apparently not by Japanese standards. They said no, even when I said I would pay the price of a normal kimchi-don.
Here's another example. In America (and in my mind) drug use is not that big of a deal. I don't mean that getting strung out on heroine or cocaine is cool, I just mean that its possible for someone to try drugs and still be a good person. Everything in moderation. In Japan, I've found that people look down on users like they are the scum of the earth. That is just a tad bit hypocritical coming from people with such a large smoking population and drinking culture...and a growing population with aids...it doesn't sound like they have their priorities straight, does it? A recent study estimates drug use at just 2.9% of the Japanese population . For comparison, in 2007, 8% of persons 12 years of age and over in America had used illicit drugs in the past month. Japan really hates drugs. Meanwhile California loves drugs but they just can't leave their bongs long enough to go vote on the issue...
Last, but certainly not least, is the excuse of tradition. When I asked why people in Shiga still make nasty fermented fish that tastes disgusting for 1000 years, the response I got was 'its tradition'. For those of you that have seen The Cove, the dolphin kill is an age old tradition as well, but I will have to elaborate on that at a later date. Apparently it doesn't matter if the tradition is gross, outdated, or barbaric. The fact that its tradition is all the justification needed to continue year after year. Seriously, trying to get an answer more detailed than 'its tradition' from a Japanese person is like pulling teeth...from a dolphin while its getting stabbed repeatedly in the face.
I love Japan, and I know the reason Japan has such a rich and beautiful culture is because they stick to their traditions with such conviction. I just wish that sometimes they would let the dumb traditions slide...
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
The Man Bag
Thank you Japan for giving me something I once thought was only for gay Europeans - the Man Bag. Seriously, thanks! I can't believe it has taken me so long to write about this, but I guess I've become so accustomed to it I forgot it was 'different' in America.
Here are a few examples. ONE TWO THREE
These are not to be confused with backpacks. Backpacks are for 10 year old kids and tourists. Unless you plan on doing some hiking in Japan, avoid backpacks. If you plan on getting a man bag, shop around, because they are common enough to have a million different styles, colors, and prices. If the price is too high (like just about everything is in Japan) then take a short trip to Korea. I got a pretty sweet knockoff over there for about 30 bucks.
Are you browsing for man bags yet? Do you need more convincing? If you had a man bag, it would be that much easier to sneak in a bottle of Suntory in to the Karaoke room. With plenty of room left over for your Fit's gum!
Many guys wear 'man bags' in Japan. This probably comes from the need to carry your stuff around all day since nobody drives. They are also quite cool looking, so it makes me wonder if people carry them cause they're cool, or if they are designed to be cool because people need to use them....deep stuff.
Here are a few examples. ONE TWO THREE
These are not to be confused with backpacks. Backpacks are for 10 year old kids and tourists. Unless you plan on doing some hiking in Japan, avoid backpacks. If you plan on getting a man bag, shop around, because they are common enough to have a million different styles, colors, and prices. If the price is too high (like just about everything is in Japan) then take a short trip to Korea. I got a pretty sweet knockoff over there for about 30 bucks.Are you browsing for man bags yet? Do you need more convincing? If you had a man bag, it would be that much easier to sneak in a bottle of Suntory in to the Karaoke room. With plenty of room left over for your Fit's gum!
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
No Mo' Kimono
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, there is nothing more beautiful than a woman in a kimono.…
Correction, there is nothing more beautiful than a Japanese woman in a kimono. There is something about a white girl in a kimono that is both awkward and kind of disgusting, but I digress...
The kimono has been around hundreds of years before America was ever discovered and is made up of many layers. So its pretty much exclusive to skinny Asian girls. Honestly, I don’t really care for the white fur that many girls tend to wear on their shoulders, it looks a bit too cave man-ish. Everything else about the kimono is ad
orable. The bright colors, the obi, the helpless way you have to walk when wearing tight clothes and tall wooden shoes. It’s the perfect outfit!
Which is why I was a little concerned when I read this. The number of people who actually know how to produce these gorgeous pieces of clothing are dying out. Kids don't seem to be lining up to take on the family kimono business like they used to.
Indeed you can walk the streets of Kyoto at any time of day and see at least 3 women in kimono, but for the most part its reserved for ceremonies. That’s a shame because if it were up to me, I’d make a day called kimono kinyoubi – kimono Fridays. I guess in a sense it would be the opposite of casual Fridays. And guys can wear Kimono too, but typically people mean a female kimono when they say kimono.
If you’re as upset as I am about the decline in Kimono producing popularity, just watch this. It always cheers me up!
And then this just brings me back down…
But this brings me way back up! Way up!
Correction, there is nothing more beautiful than a Japanese woman in a kimono. There is something about a white girl in a kimono that is both awkward and kind of disgusting, but I digress...
The kimono has been around hundreds of years before America was ever discovered and is made up of many layers. So its pretty much exclusive to skinny Asian girls. Honestly, I don’t really care for the white fur that many girls tend to wear on their shoulders, it looks a bit too cave man-ish. Everything else about the kimono is ad
orable. The bright colors, the obi, the helpless way you have to walk when wearing tight clothes and tall wooden shoes. It’s the perfect outfit!Which is why I was a little concerned when I read this. The number of people who actually know how to produce these gorgeous pieces of clothing are dying out. Kids don't seem to be lining up to take on the family kimono business like they used to.
Indeed you can walk the streets of Kyoto at any time of day and see at least 3 women in kimono, but for the most part its reserved for ceremonies. That’s a shame because if it were up to me, I’d make a day called kimono kinyoubi – kimono Fridays. I guess in a sense it would be the opposite of casual Fridays. And guys can wear Kimono too, but typically people mean a female kimono when they say kimono.
If you’re as upset as I am about the decline in Kimono producing popularity, just watch this. It always cheers me up!
And then this just brings me back down…
But this brings me way back up! Way up!
Friday, October 1, 2010
マクド
Japanese McDonald's are going to start banning smoking. Go ahead and let that sink in for a second. Is it just me or does that sound absolutely retarded? Cause you certainly wouldn't want the mild inconvenience of smoking while your sipping your 4000 calorie milkshake, right??
For some reason, Japan has been moving in the anti-smoking direction recently...and I don't see the point. Japan even recently imposed its largest tax hike on cigarettes. So much for 300 yen per pack (about $3.70). Its now up to about 440 yen per pack (about $5.40).
For the most part, smoking establishments have decent ventilation or even a separate section separated by a glass door. And in case you haven't done your research or even seen an episode of Penn & Teller's Bull Shit, it hasn't been proven that second hand smoke is harmful. Just let this guy give you the short version. Nevertheless, I find it extremely hypocritical that Makudo would start banning smoking. Being only 24, I can vaguely remember a time in America where smoking was still cool to do indoors, but I always thought Japan would stick to its guns.
Speaking of McDonald's, I usually enjoy all the specialized foods the Japanese McDonald's has to offer, but it tends to be lost on the gaijin crowd. Foreigners (basically, Americans) tend to look at the menu items in a mixture of surprise and disgust. I can only respond with two words..."Screw you." Seriously, its hard to talk about how gross a teriyaki or shrimp burger are when you come from a country that eats Chitterlings, Turducken, and Deep Fried Twinkies. And KFC just came out with a damn "sandwich" that's just two pieces of chicken, bacon and cheese! Congratulations on developing a 3000 calorie sandwich without a single friggin vitamin.
I honestly wish McDonalds in America was more like the Makudo in Japan - because then I might actually go...
For some reason, Japan has been moving in the anti-smoking direction recently...and I don't see the point. Japan even recently imposed its largest tax hike on cigarettes. So much for 300 yen per pack (about $3.70). Its now up to about 440 yen per pack (about $5.40).
For the most part, smoking establishments have decent ventilation or even a separate section separated by a glass door. And in case you haven't done your research or even seen an episode of Penn & Teller's Bull Shit, it hasn't been proven that second hand smoke is harmful. Just let this guy give you the short version. Nevertheless, I find it extremely hypocritical that Makudo would start banning smoking. Being only 24, I can vaguely remember a time in America where smoking was still cool to do indoors, but I always thought Japan would stick to its guns.
Speaking of McDonald's, I usually enjoy all the specialized foods the Japanese McDonald's has to offer, but it tends to be lost on the gaijin crowd. Foreigners (basically, Americans) tend to look at the menu items in a mixture of surprise and disgust. I can only respond with two words..."Screw you." Seriously, its hard to talk about how gross a teriyaki or shrimp burger are when you come from a country that eats Chitterlings, Turducken, and Deep Fried Twinkies. And KFC just came out with a damn "sandwich" that's just two pieces of chicken, bacon and cheese! Congratulations on developing a 3000 calorie sandwich without a single friggin vitamin.
I honestly wish McDonalds in America was more like the Makudo in Japan - because then I might actually go...
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Thats Profiling!
Its hard to talk about racial profiling in Japan without sounding like I'm profiling Japanese people myself, but what the heck, I'll give it a shot.
In 1 year, I was stopped about 3 times on my bicycle, and at least once at a train station and asked where I was going and if that was actually my bike. It was kind of fun at first because I got to practice my Japanese with some police officers. Which is even more fun than it sounds considering most cops I've seen in Japan are 50+ years old so the threat of a baton shampoo is minimal.
The first time I was stopped I had only been in Japan for 1 month, so my Japanese was extremely limited but I managed to get the point across that it was my bike and I was just going home. This was said with the confidence only umeshu could bring and a lot of hand gestures. After the third time being pulled over, I made sure to study some new Japanese words. Words like Sabetsu (discrimination) and Kuso! Satsu ga kita! (oh sh%&, its the cops!) are some good words to start with. Its also important to keep your gaijin card with you at all times, cause those coppers will most definitely ask to see it.
Apparently this doesn't just happen to foreigners. It happens to Japanese who appear to be foreigners as well!
So I guess all us foreigners do in Japan is commit crimes. Which is actually not too far from the truth, it just sucks that I'm constantly questioned by the police. A big thank you goes out to all the inconsiderate gaijin douches in Japan for committing gaijin hanzai (foreign crime).
P.S. For those of you unaware, riding your bike inebriated is illegal, in America and Japan. So I would try to keep the times you ride your bike blitzed to a minimum.
Pictured: sweet ride
In 1 year, I was stopped about 3 times on my bicycle, and at least once at a train station and asked where I was going and if that was actually my bike. It was kind of fun at first because I got to practice my Japanese with some police officers. Which is even more fun than it sounds considering most cops I've seen in Japan are 50+ years old so the threat of a baton shampoo is minimal.
The first time I was stopped I had only been in Japan for 1 month, so my Japanese was extremely limited but I managed to get the point across that it was my bike and I was just going home. This was said with the confidence only umeshu could bring and a lot of hand gestures. After the third time being pulled over, I made sure to study some new Japanese words. Words like Sabetsu (discrimination) and Kuso! Satsu ga kita! (oh sh%&, its the cops!) are some good words to start with. Its also important to keep your gaijin card with you at all times, cause those coppers will most definitely ask to see it.
Apparently this doesn't just happen to foreigners. It happens to Japanese who appear to be foreigners as well!
So I guess all us foreigners do in Japan is commit crimes. Which is actually not too far from the truth, it just sucks that I'm constantly questioned by the police. A big thank you goes out to all the inconsiderate gaijin douches in Japan for committing gaijin hanzai (foreign crime).
P.S. For those of you unaware, riding your bike inebriated is illegal, in America and Japan. So I would try to keep the times you ride your bike blitzed to a minimum.Pictured: sweet ride
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
More on Japanese Haircuts
In a previous post I mentioned a writer for the Japan Times and their interesting articles, but I think I have changed my mind. I've made it through just about all of this guys articles in the Japan Times and have come to the conclusion that this guy is too much of a typical American for me. In one of his articles, he actually says "I hate karaoke." Who hates karaoke??? Its probably because he is on the older side, but this article kind of bothered me. You can poke fun at Japan's odors, odd food, and crowds but anyone who has any doubts in the Japanese haircut has some serious issues. The line "But I dreaded going to a Japanese barber" made my blood boil. First of all, what the hell is a 'Barber'? Its not the 50's anymore, I think hair stylist or even hair artist is more appropriate.
I'll admit that I was a bit nervous the first time I went to get a haircut in Japan, but that was because I had been there a whole month and was worried I couldn't make small talk (which was not a problem at all). Every Japanese person under 40 had awesome hair and was 'man pretty', so I was not at all worried about what the final product would look like.
Actual haircut aside, the experience is well worth whatever you are paying. I don't know about you but I don't mind being pampered and massaged for dirt cheap.
I guess in the end it doesn't matter what that guy thinks. More haircuts for me!
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Gaijin Perspective
I managed to stumble upon a writer for The Japan Times, Thomas Dillon. He is a gaijin living in Japan. Well, not really Japan, in Tokyo. His views are a little jaded and his love for Japan is not as passionate as mine, but we have a lot of common ground. His articles have reminded me of a lot of feelings I have about Japan, many of which I have forgotten about.
Its strange how easy and how quickly it is to get used to something when its in your face ever day. Things such as the smells of Japan, or how ridiculous it is to buy souvenirs for everyone you know has already been moved to the back of my mind. I only notice the smells of Japan after being away for a long time, and I AM one of those idiots that follows the omiyage code of conduct.
Allow me to explain. When it comes to shopping and ritualistic obligation, Japan takes the gold for both. So when someone goes on a vacation, no matter the occassion, it is no surprise that they are expected to buy omiyage (souvenirs) for everyone and anyone they know or plan on knowing. A concept that, on the surfaces, sounds wasteful and expensive...which it is. However, I found myself taking part in before I even knew I was ４万円 poorer on both my trip to Korea and Hiroshima. By the way, ４万円 buys you quite a bit of momijimanju and crap to hang from your phone...
As for the smells, Japan just smells like Japan to me. It is a unique and wonderful smell that I have learned to associate with drunken good times. I wish they bottled that smell. I've been trying to pick apart the exact smell but it always eludes me. I'm sure that fish and soy sauce are a major part of it, but that sounds a tad racist...Rest assured, if I ever put my finger on it, I will share it with the world.
Here are the two articles that jogged my memory. They are worth a read.
An Odor by Any Other Name
A Journey on the Road More Traveled
Its strange how easy and how quickly it is to get used to something when its in your face ever day. Things such as the smells of Japan, or how ridiculous it is to buy souvenirs for everyone you know has already been moved to the back of my mind. I only notice the smells of Japan after being away for a long time, and I AM one of those idiots that follows the omiyage code of conduct.
Allow me to explain. When it comes to shopping and ritualistic obligation, Japan takes the gold for both. So when someone goes on a vacation, no matter the occassion, it is no surprise that they are expected to buy omiyage (souvenirs) for everyone and anyone they know or plan on knowing. A concept that, on the surfaces, sounds wasteful and expensive...which it is. However, I found myself taking part in before I even knew I was ４万円 poorer on both my trip to Korea and Hiroshima. By the way, ４万円 buys you quite a bit of momijimanju and crap to hang from your phone...
As for the smells, Japan just smells like Japan to me. It is a unique and wonderful smell that I have learned to associate with drunken good times. I wish they bottled that smell. I've been trying to pick apart the exact smell but it always eludes me. I'm sure that fish and soy sauce are a major part of it, but that sounds a tad racist...Rest assured, if I ever put my finger on it, I will share it with the world.
Here are the two articles that jogged my memory. They are worth a read.
An Odor by Any Other Name
A Journey on the Road More Traveled
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Japanese Food
やった！ I got myself some of those unique Kit Kats I was talking about earlier. I still need to find some of the seasonal ones to try (though they probably aren't around anymore), but I have Soy Sauce and Red Bean Paste now. Honestly, I'm usually not a big fan of the red bean paste. I wasn't too fond of the original もみじまんじゅ (Momijimanju), the popular sweet from 宮島 (Miyajima) that is filled with red bean paste. I was a bit skeptical about the red bean Kit Kat, but it was awesome. It was somewhat chewy, and the bean paste was not overpowering. The taste was almost caramel-ish. It doesn't taste nearly as strange as its name implies. The Sakura and Green Tea Kit Kat's however taste exactly how they sound and are extremely delicious. I love just about anything green tea flavored but the Sakura one was quite refreshing. Whenever you find them, buy them in bulk!
Speaking of Japanese food, Banana Vending machines are making their way across Japan. If you click on that article, it has some good information, but I'm not too fond of the writer (it sounds like they have no idea what they are talking about). If they sold bananas in vending machines in America, then I would share their concerns with freshness. I wouldn't eat a Twinkie out of an American vending machine for fear of it being well past the expiration date, but I trust Japan. The line "You can find them almost everywhere, if you know where to look." doesn't make much sense either...
This concept just further supports the idea that ANYTHING can be bought from a vending machine in Japan. If I could only find a vending machine with out of season Kit Kat flavors....
Speaking of Japanese food, Banana Vending machines are making their way across Japan. If you click on that article, it has some good information, but I'm not too fond of the writer (it sounds like they have no idea what they are talking about). If they sold bananas in vending machines in America, then I would share their concerns with freshness. I wouldn't eat a Twinkie out of an American vending machine for fear of it being well past the expiration date, but I trust Japan. The line "You can find them almost everywhere, if you know where to look." doesn't make much sense either...
This concept just further supports the idea that ANYTHING can be bought from a vending machine in Japan. If I could only find a vending machine with out of season Kit Kat flavors....
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Shocker!
Wow, the prime minister of Japan resigned. That never happens! oh, wait, thats like the fourth time in four years. Japanese prime ministers all seem to follow the same pattern.
Step 1: Make a lot of promises
Step 2: Get elected
Step 3: Spend a lot of money on things to distract from not being able to meet any promises
Step 4: Have a scandal discovered
Step 5: Resign
Step 6: Repeat
Its getting a little ridiculous. Lets see how this Naoto Kan fellow can hang on. I give him 8 months.
In more scandalous news, Japan has been trying to get the ban on whaling lifted by using money and prostitutes. I'm not really sure how to explain this one except Japan is so dead set in its ways that it would rather bribe other countries than have to eat a few less whales. But I bet if Japan came along and ate and killed turkeys to near extinction and then told the U.S. they couldn't eat them anymore that would cause some unrest too, but I digress...
Instead of whale, why don't the Japanese focus on their more delicious sushi. One plate each of kyuri, inari, and natto maki is a complete meal in itself. No fish or endangered mammal required. Don't these pictures make you hungry??
Oh, I stole the pictures from Kappazushi's website.
Step 1: Make a lot of promises
Step 2: Get elected
Step 3: Spend a lot of money on things to distract from not being able to meet any promises
Step 4: Have a scandal discovered
Step 5: Resign
Step 6: Repeat
Its getting a little ridiculous. Lets see how this Naoto Kan fellow can hang on. I give him 8 months.
In more scandalous news, Japan has been trying to get the ban on whaling lifted by using money and prostitutes. I'm not really sure how to explain this one except Japan is so dead set in its ways that it would rather bribe other countries than have to eat a few less whales. But I bet if Japan came along and ate and killed turkeys to near extinction and then told the U.S. they couldn't eat them anymore that would cause some unrest too, but I digress...
Instead of whale, why don't the Japanese focus on their more delicious sushi. One plate each of kyuri, inari, and natto maki is a complete meal in itself. No fish or endangered mammal required. Don't these pictures make you hungry??
Oh, I stole the pictures from Kappazushi's website.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Too much of a good thing
Yes, it is possible to have too much of a good thing, even when that good thing is Japan. A good buddy of mine introduced me to this website and article. This guy has lived in Japan long enough to see the ugly side. It happened to myself, but I've always tried to give Japan the benefit of the doubt or blame my own ignorance. This particular article provides an unfiltered rant on some real issues that one might come across on a regular basis. He brings up some good points, though I don't have nearly as big of an issue with smoking as he does. But as for smoking at 'toddler-eyeball-burning height' - I think I've actually seen a warning sign that shows a kid getting his face burned. He is correct in that virtually EVERY video game console in an arcade has an ash tray on it. Its interesting to note here that I have yet to see someone steal one of those ash trays.
I was surprised to hear about another vegetarian in Japan, and I completely sympathize with this guy. You can try to avoid meat in Japan, but its a 25 hour a day job. Japan still equates meat to 'genki' - a feeling of energy and vitality. This is akin to the 50's motto of 'eat your red meat, its good for you', which is obviously retarded. I've had numerous experiences like his bacon salad adventure. I usually try to give Japan the benefit of the doubt and figure that Niku (meat) is used to describe the big hunks of meat, not the minced stuff that finds its way in to everything. Big chunks or not, its still meat.
The 'screaming is the message' section was particularly hilarious. Many a time I found myself getting some melon-pan (oh so delicious) at a conbini, standing right next to someone restocking the shelves. Then out of nowhere some incoherent shout caused by Japanese turrets scares the crap out of me, and then silence. Does this guy need help? Should I be calling 119? (Now you know how to call the ambulance in case of an emergency!)
Though everything he says is a little spiteful and a tad overly sarcastic, its fact. I'm so glad to hear that Japanese TV bugs someone else as much as me. I just thought I was spoiled by one of the few things America actually does well.
If you get sick of hearing how awesome Japan is, check out more stuff from Tim
I was surprised to hear about another vegetarian in Japan, and I completely sympathize with this guy. You can try to avoid meat in Japan, but its a 25 hour a day job. Japan still equates meat to 'genki' - a feeling of energy and vitality. This is akin to the 50's motto of 'eat your red meat, its good for you', which is obviously retarded. I've had numerous experiences like his bacon salad adventure. I usually try to give Japan the benefit of the doubt and figure that Niku (meat) is used to describe the big hunks of meat, not the minced stuff that finds its way in to everything. Big chunks or not, its still meat.
The 'screaming is the message' section was particularly hilarious. Many a time I found myself getting some melon-pan (oh so delicious) at a conbini, standing right next to someone restocking the shelves. Then out of nowhere some incoherent shout caused by Japanese turrets scares the crap out of me, and then silence. Does this guy need help? Should I be calling 119? (Now you know how to call the ambulance in case of an emergency!)
Though everything he says is a little spiteful and a tad overly sarcastic, its fact. I'm so glad to hear that Japanese TV bugs someone else as much as me. I just thought I was spoiled by one of the few things America actually does well.
If you get sick of hearing how awesome Japan is, check out more stuff from Tim
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Break me off a piece of that soy sauce bar!
This is a follow up to a post I've already made. I've already mentioned some of the fantastic flavors that Japan has to offer such as ketchup and mayonnaise Pringles, but I seemed to have left some amazing flavors out.
Here is a review of some of the odd Kit Kat flavors Japan sells. I've only had the privilege of trying about half of these. Royal milk tea was quite good, but you have to be a fan of milk tea already. The green tea was very good too but I'm not sure why. The bitterness of the green tea plus the sweetness of the chocolate just went really well. I'm a little disappointed they didn't review the 'apple' flavor, cause I'm sure the comments would have read something like
"better than chrystal meth!", or something along those lines. I didn't know what true happiness was until I found apple Kit Kats.
My lady friend claims that the Soy Sauce flavor is pretty decent, just a bit salty. Apparently salty flavors are popular in Japan lately. I hope Japan isn't growing out of the corn mayonnaise phase!!! I haven't tried it yet, but I would recommend dipping the corn flavored Kit Kat in mayonnaise....I can't see how that could be bad.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Herbivores
Check this out. Its an interesting article about how more Japanese kids are becoming less motivated and men are becoming less manly. This is another article that focuses on men in particular. They call these unmotivated, more effeminate men 'herbivores'. Before I continue, let me just say that find calling feminine men 'herbivores' a bit offensive - especially considering that all human beings are herbivores. Nah, I'm not really offended, but I'm pretty sure that name was picked to be offensive.
Japanese kids are supposed becoming less motivated to find a good job or even study abroad. The men are supposedly becoming less motivated to go through the motions of dating and finding a wife. There must be a problem there because I've seen Japanese women and any guy who wouldn't want to date them is obviously sick....or gay, which is a valid excuse. I've heard many reasons for this trend. Reasons such as no war makes it unnecessary for men to prove their manliness or people are just not motivated to work 14 hour days for the rest of their life, can you blame them?? In defense of the Japanese kids, the survey conducted in the first article to show this trend was a little cheesy.
I feel like this trend has been occurring everywhere, but in Japan (a country very resistant to any kind of change) this kind of change is considered a step back and very scary.
Japanese kids are supposed becoming less motivated to find a good job or even study abroad. The men are supposedly becoming less motivated to go through the motions of dating and finding a wife. There must be a problem there because I've seen Japanese women and any guy who wouldn't want to date them is obviously sick....or gay, which is a valid excuse. I've heard many reasons for this trend. Reasons such as no war makes it unnecessary for men to prove their manliness or people are just not motivated to work 14 hour days for the rest of their life, can you blame them?? In defense of the Japanese kids, the survey conducted in the first article to show this trend was a little cheesy.
I feel like this trend has been occurring everywhere, but in Japan (a country very resistant to any kind of change) this kind of change is considered a step back and very scary.
Monday, April 19, 2010
What The Japanese Have That You Don't
Finally, I have a scientific response to the often asked "what do the Japanese have that we (Americans) don't?"
Besides the obvious answer of manners and an understanding of the world outside their own country, the Japanese have a specific gene that Americans do not.
In USA TODAY, I just read that the Japanese have a specific gene for breaking down porphyran, which is found in seaweed. Pretty sweet でしょう？ So much for 'we are all the same on the inside'.
One a similar note, I freakin love 海苔 (nori/seaweed). There are all different types of seaweed and its found in all types of Japanese cuisine. You can put it on your rice like this, or you can just eat the dried sheets like big potato chips (probably my favorite way to enjoy it). Probably not good for your sodium intake, but delicious!
Besides the obvious answer of manners and an understanding of the world outside their own country, the Japanese have a specific gene that Americans do not.
In USA TODAY, I just read that the Japanese have a specific gene for breaking down porphyran, which is found in seaweed. Pretty sweet でしょう？ So much for 'we are all the same on the inside'.
One a similar note, I freakin love 海苔 (nori/seaweed). There are all different types of seaweed and its found in all types of Japanese cuisine. You can put it on your rice like this, or you can just eat the dried sheets like big potato chips (probably my favorite way to enjoy it). Probably not good for your sodium intake, but delicious!
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Jihanki
I've only talked about these in passing, but I'd like to discuss vending machines, 自販機, in a little more detail. In America you only hear about the weird ones that dispense panties, liquor, and porn. This is just the tip of the iceberg. I would venture to say you could get EVERYTHING you could want from a vending machine in Japan. Here are some futsuu and bizarre vending machines. This article offers some additional insight into Japanese society and vending machines and how vending machines actually work in Japan. I have yet to see a machine out of order or steal my dollar. Interestingly, you can use 1000 yen bills (about $11) in jihanki, which is unheard of in America. The article is written in real (British) English, so I hope you know what a 'metre' is...
If you don't have any money (like after an expensive trip to Soap Land or something like that) you can use your phone to buy stuff from some vending machines. You can also get cold drinks in the summer, and hot drinks in the winter. Hot corn soup or boss coffee makes the winter bike rides quite tolerable. Recently Japan initiated a pass system requiring a special card to buy cigarettes to keep the underage kids from getting their hands on them. This pass system spread pretty quickly around Osaka, but I'm not sure its made its way to the countryside yet.
The chu-hai vending machine will always hold a special place in my heart but, like the trains, they shut down around midnight. So start your boozing early or plan ahead!
Saturday, April 10, 2010
ちゃりに乗る時
I came across this article today and it paints a pretty clear picture of what commuting is like in any Japanese city - not just Tokyo.
I found the 'mamas on bikes' section particularly spot on. Why are you still reading this, read the other article! (’-’*)
One thing they left out of the article is the sweet little bike bell. Unlike in America where the car horn is typically a sign of someone's frustration, the bike bell is a courteous tool that most people (about 99% from my experience) move out of the way for. The only people who don't are the 60+ year old salary men who are stubborn as hell. Here is an awesome video to illustrate my point.
I think now is a good time to bring up an interesting fact about Japan - Japan is more than just Tokyo. Say what?!?! Yeah, its true. Tokyo is a pretty cool city, but its not the only city (though it is the largest city in the world), and a lot of gaijin tend to forget that. But since most movies that deal with Japan take place in Tokyo, and most companies have their headquarters there, you are pretty much forced to see or work in Tokyo at some point in time....so all is forgiven.
I actually found Tokyo to be the least 'Japanese' city in Japan - it has a huge foreign population and a Chipotle - how Japanese could Tokyo actually be??
I found the 'mamas on bikes' section particularly spot on. Why are you still reading this, read the other article! (’-’*)
One thing they left out of the article is the sweet little bike bell. Unlike in America where the car horn is typically a sign of someone's frustration, the bike bell is a courteous tool that most people (about 99% from my experience) move out of the way for. The only people who don't are the 60+ year old salary men who are stubborn as hell. Here is an awesome video to illustrate my point.
I think now is a good time to bring up an interesting fact about Japan - Japan is more than just Tokyo. Say what?!?! Yeah, its true. Tokyo is a pretty cool city, but its not the only city (though it is the largest city in the world), and a lot of gaijin tend to forget that. But since most movies that deal with Japan take place in Tokyo, and most companies have their headquarters there, you are pretty much forced to see or work in Tokyo at some point in time....so all is forgiven.
I actually found Tokyo to be the least 'Japanese' city in Japan - it has a huge foreign population and a Chipotle - how Japanese could Tokyo actually be??
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Engrish
I stumbled across an interesting TV show in Japan the other day (yes, an interesting Japanese TV show. I was just as surprised as you) and it really opened my eyes about the English language. This show, Eigo de shabera naito, is an educational and entertaining show that tests the English ability of non native speakers. It is co-hosted by a goofy looking goober Patrick Harlan who actually seems like a decent guy. He's a gaijin talent from the US.
Native English speakers, particularly Americans, are very quick to laugh or poke fun at incorrect English but if you do the math, the ratio of native English speakers to non-native is about 1:4 ( have seen the numbers vary from about 1:3 to 1:5). This is a pretty humbling statistic. Not only does it make my own 'version' of English seem insignificant, but just knowing that such a large group of people are at least bilingual makes me feel a bit stupid and want to study Japanese harder.
So what is English really? English to me is just communication. If the listener/reader understands, isn't that enough? Isn't that the point?
Here is a youtube clip of the TV show:
Mary Kate and Ashley in Japan
Native English speakers, particularly Americans, are very quick to laugh or poke fun at incorrect English but if you do the math, the ratio of native English speakers to non-native is about 1:4 ( have seen the numbers vary from about 1:3 to 1:5). This is a pretty humbling statistic. Not only does it make my own 'version' of English seem insignificant, but just knowing that such a large group of people are at least bilingual makes me feel a bit stupid and want to study Japanese harder.
So what is English really? English to me is just communication. If the listener/reader understands, isn't that enough? Isn't that the point?
Here is a youtube clip of the TV show:
Mary Kate and Ashley in Japan
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
hafu
Believe it or not, Japan has an ugly side, and I mean ugly in the literal sense. Hafu (half Japanese, half something else, usually white) receive a lot of undeserved attention and stardom in Japan. Look at these links to judge for yourself, but the majority of hafu are gross (the ones that are famous anyways, I personally know some hafu that are real lookers) in my opinion. Go ahead, click some of the links.
Anna Ohura
Kimura Kaela
Becky
...Gross, right?? I think that horse faced Becky tart is probably the worst of them. Becky, if you are reading this I think you're a 6 at best and how you became famous is beyond me... （ ´∀｀）
Most of them enjoy celebrity status because they are too untalented or unattractive to be a celebrity anywhere else or they are parents of other Japanese celebrities. This started as an informative post and ended up pretty hateful...my bad.
Not ALL celebrity hafu are gross, but it would be safe to say the majority are. And I hear the word 'hafu' kind of has a negative connotation to it, so use it sparingly.
Anna Ohura
Kimura Kaela
Becky
...Gross, right?? I think that horse faced Becky tart is probably the worst of them. Becky, if you are reading this I think you're a 6 at best and how you became famous is beyond me... （ ´∀｀）
Most of them enjoy celebrity status because they are too untalented or unattractive to be a celebrity anywhere else or they are parents of other Japanese celebrities. This started as an informative post and ended up pretty hateful...my bad.
Not ALL celebrity hafu are gross, but it would be safe to say the majority are. And I hear the word 'hafu' kind of has a negative connotation to it, so use it sparingly.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
More on Japanese snacks
Words cannot express how much of a sucker I am for Japanese snacks.
In America I eat an average of 5 chips a year, and about 10 cheez-its. But as soon as I landed in Japan I was double fisting pocky and jyagariko.
What I like
In America I eat an average of 5 chips a year, and about 10 cheez-its. But as soon as I landed in Japan I was double fisting pocky and jyagariko.
the most are the unique flavors. Melon and apple kit kats, ume and salad jyagariko, milk tea and green tea chocolate.These are all AMAZING. Here are some pictures of what you should be buying/eating every chance you get.
The drinks are equally creative in flavor. I recommend the ume calpis.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Hotel Fine goes down in the second round...
I may or may not have gone to the Water Hotel recently (www.waterhotel-cc.com) . And it may or may not be just a 5 minute walk west from nanpabashi-right next to hotel dress...
The Water Hotel was classy, but very different from my past favorite -
Hotel Fine. For one, what the Water Hotel lacks in the nomihoudai department it makes up for in a fantastic shower and mood lighting with a million+ options. The bathroom is pretty big with a bath tub that has a nice mat next to it for massages and the like. There is no 100 inch projection TV, but the 50 inch flat screen is sufficient enough.
Ordering food was a little different than Hotel Fine as well. Like Fine, you get a free breakfast and a free drink, but it is not dropped off in a little mailbox dealie, you actually have to answer your door and receive it from someone. This is a little strange for a love hotel, but it didn't bother me any. Like Hotel Fine, in this hotel, being a member takes about 1000 yen off the price for the night, however membership costs 500 yen - well worth it.
Even the Karaoke selection was better. And playing 'Taiko no Tatsujin' free was a definite bonus!
My two
issues with the hotel were that it was about 9000 degrees in the room when I walked in, but that may be due to it being winter and they wanted the room to be comfortable. The ash trays also didn't say the name of the hotel on them so they weren't worth stealing...
So if you are looking for a classy love hotel in the Nanba/Shinsaibashi area, look no further than the Water Hotel.
The Water Hotel was classy, but very different from my past favorite -
Hotel Fine. For one, what the Water Hotel lacks in the nomihoudai department it makes up for in a fantastic shower and mood lighting with a million+ options. The bathroom is pretty big with a bath tub that has a nice mat next to it for massages and the like. There is no 100 inch projection TV, but the 50 inch flat screen is sufficient enough.Ordering food was a little different than Hotel Fine as well. Like Fine, you get a free breakfast and a free drink, but it is not dropped off in a little mailbox dealie, you actually have to answer your door and receive it from someone. This is a little strange for a love hotel, but it didn't bother me any. Like Hotel Fine, in this hotel, being a member takes about 1000 yen off the price for the night, however membership costs 500 yen - well worth it.
Even the Karaoke selection was better. And playing 'Taiko no Tatsujin' free was a definite bonus!
My two
issues with the hotel were that it was about 9000 degrees in the room when I walked in, but that may be due to it being winter and they wanted the room to be comfortable. The ash trays also didn't say the name of the hotel on them so they weren't worth stealing...So if you are looking for a classy love hotel in the Nanba/Shinsaibashi area, look no further than the Water Hotel.
Monday, February 15, 2010
1,2,3's
After running out of letters in the alphabet, I guess I will move on to numbers. Here are the 1,2,3's of living in Japan.
1： 一石二鳥 (issekinichou),literally 1 stone, 2 birds. I found it interesting that Japan has the same phrase,two birds one stone. Especially a phrase as dumb as this one.
2: 二人乗り (futarinori),2 people riding, usually a bicycle. you see this often in Japan, though I'm pretty sure its illegal (for scooters anyway). But without a car in Japan, this is the next best way to pick up chicks. Just make sure you buy a bike with the metal seat dealie in the back.
3-3P (sanpi-), threesome. Some things are universal.
4-四川 (shisen),Japanese word for Szechwan, the region in china known for spicy food. I know I mention Shisen Ra-men a lot, but seriously, that place is magic.
5-甘味 (Umami), the fifth taste. Also known as savoriness, this taste classification was first developed by Kikunae Ikeda.
6- 週六日 (shuumuika), 6 days a week. If you are lucky enough to live in Japan but unfortunate enough to work for a Japanese company, this is about how often you will work.
7-七味 (shichimi), blend of 7 spices. The spices include Cayenne and Japanese pepper. Its a popular seasoning and goes great with Yoshinoya.
8-ヤクザ (Yakuza), the badass organized crime group with a heart of gold. Their name is an abbreviation of the numbers 8-9-3. With the exception of all the gross porn they produce, I think these guys are awesome.
9- 99 (kyukyu). The 99 yen shop, or kyu kyu, is like an American dollar store but with more food. Its a convenient place to stock up on CalorieMate and Onigiri Senbei. There is also a 100 yen shop which is pretty popular.
10-is for 一万円 (ichimanen),10,000 yen. Get used to carrying these bills around...but not for very long.
1： 一石二鳥 (issekinichou),literally 1 stone, 2 birds. I found it interesting that Japan has the same phrase,two birds one stone. Especially a phrase as dumb as this one.
2: 二人乗り (futarinori),2 people riding, usually a bicycle. you see this often in Japan, though I'm pretty sure its illegal (for scooters anyway). But without a car in Japan, this is the next best way to pick up chicks. Just make sure you buy a bike with the metal seat dealie in the back.
3-3P (sanpi-), threesome. Some things are universal.
4-四川 (shisen),Japanese word for Szechwan, the region in china known for spicy food. I know I mention Shisen Ra-men a lot, but seriously, that place is magic.
5-甘味 (Umami), the fifth taste. Also known as savoriness, this taste classification was first developed by Kikunae Ikeda.
6- 週六日 (shuumuika), 6 days a week. If you are lucky enough to live in Japan but unfortunate enough to work for a Japanese company, this is about how often you will work.
7-七味 (shichimi), blend of 7 spices. The spices include Cayenne and Japanese pepper. Its a popular seasoning and goes great with Yoshinoya.
8-ヤクザ (Yakuza), the badass organized crime group with a heart of gold. Their name is an abbreviation of the numbers 8-9-3. With the exception of all the gross porn they produce, I think these guys are awesome.
9- 99 (kyukyu). The 99 yen shop, or kyu kyu, is like an American dollar store but with more food. Its a convenient place to stock up on CalorieMate and Onigiri Senbei. There is also a 100 yen shop which is pretty popular.
10-is for 一万円 (ichimanen),10,000 yen. Get used to carrying these bills around...but not for very long.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
ペラペラになろう。。。
I stumbled across a news article that gave the ABC's of Japan. Some of the letters were actually funny/informative. Here is the link if you're interested. But I felt that this list was a little lacking and decided to make my own ABC's. I'm sure my list will be WAY more helpful in understanding Japan/Japanese.
A- Asadachi (朝立ち) : Morning wood. Its a funny word and it got your attention didn't it? The two kanji are morning and standing...
B- Ba- (バー) : Bar. Its where a great deal of your time should be spent.
C- CM (シーエム) : Commercial. Heres is a catchy one. Japan is known for their ridiculous and ridiculously expensive commercials.
D- Densha (電車) - Train. You aren't going anywhere without a train in Japan, unless you have 3 grand to drop on a license and about $1.80/L for gas.
E-Eki (駅) : Train Station. This is where you would ride the 電車. Eki (液) also means fluid. As in Aieki.
F-Futsuu (普通) : This is local train that stops at every station. Also used to describe your day when nothing interesting happens...which should be never
G-Gyaru (ギャル) : The more flashy, girly style in Japan. This is the only fashion as far as I'm concerned!
H- Homodachi - Not a real Japanese word but the equivalent of Bromosexual. Younger Japanese can appreciate/understand this word.
I- Izakaya (居酒屋) : A Japanese drinking establishment. A midway between a bar and a restaurant.
J-Jyagariko (じゃがりこ) : Japanese snack similar to a Hot Fry but better and flavors include salad, cheese, and ume. This snack is the reason I say ittadakimasu 10+ times a day.
K- Kaidama (かいだま) : Extra noodles you can order to put in to your Ramen broth. A good word to know if you go to Shisen Ramen, a chain ramen restaurant.
L- Love Hotel (ラブホテル) : You should know what this is by now.
M- Mata (股) : Literally crotch or groin area but its used to describe the 'Gap'. The 'Gap' being the space between Japanese women's legs that goes all the way up. Cho Sexy!
N- pick any N word and you can say it in Japan!
O-Otsukaresama (お疲れ様) : Kind of like 'Good Job' or 'Thats enough, you worked hard today'. You can say it to anyone or anything that just worked hard.
P- Purikura (プリクラ) : Short for Print Club. An amazing photo both experience for about 400円.
Q- This one is a little difficult seeing as Japanese doesn't have anything like a Q, but how about Kyuuri. It sounds like Q-Lee, and is one of my favorites at kappa-zushi. Its cucumber sushi.
R-Rikimaru (力丸) : A chain izakaya (居酒屋) where everything is 300 yen. The portions are small so you can taste a lot of things. I recommend also getting the Ramune Chu-hai or a Suntory Highball.
S- Seibyou (性病) : STD. Just watch out for these.
T- Tokumori (特盛り) : The special size. This is the largest serving size at Yoshinoya.
U- Ume. (梅) : Japanese plum. It is a popular flavor and used to make umeshu, 梅酒, the greatest liquor ever created.
V- Valentine's Day (バレンタインデー) : Celebrated Feb 14th by women giving expensive chocolate to men. Way better than that BS hallmark holiday in America.
W-Wakewakaranai (訳分からない) : Incomprehensible, that doesn't make sense. You'll need this word if you attempt reading any Engrish.
X-Xenophobia : Fear of that which is different from oneself. Luckily this is dying out in Japan, but you may still find some old fogeys bad mouthing you in Japanese to your face. But they will die soon so the jokes on them...
y-Yu (湯) : Hot water, bath. You can find 'ゆ' signs throughout Japan. The sign indicates a public bath where you can sit and relax. I recommend it (and yes, you have to do it naked).
Z- Ze (ぜ) : A sentence end that basically adds force or makes you sound cooler. Its akin to ending an English sentence in 'yo' or 'bitch', it adds emphasis.
Thats it for now. If you would like to further look up some words/kanji, I recommend Jim Breen. Its pretty helpful - I use it all the time.
A- Asadachi (朝立ち) : Morning wood. Its a funny word and it got your attention didn't it? The two kanji are morning and standing...
B- Ba- (バー) : Bar. Its where a great deal of your time should be spent.
C- CM (シーエム) : Commercial. Heres is a catchy one. Japan is known for their ridiculous and ridiculously expensive commercials.
D- Densha (電車) - Train. You aren't going anywhere without a train in Japan, unless you have 3 grand to drop on a license and about $1.80/L for gas.
E-Eki (駅) : Train Station. This is where you would ride the 電車. Eki (液) also means fluid. As in Aieki.
F-Futsuu (普通) : This is local train that stops at every station. Also used to describe your day when nothing interesting happens...which should be never
G-Gyaru (ギャル) : The more flashy, girly style in Japan. This is the only fashion as far as I'm concerned!
H- Homodachi - Not a real Japanese word but the equivalent of Bromosexual. Younger Japanese can appreciate/understand this word.
I- Izakaya (居酒屋) : A Japanese drinking establishment. A midway between a bar and a restaurant.
J-Jyagariko (じゃがりこ) : Japanese snack similar to a Hot Fry but better and flavors include salad, cheese, and ume. This snack is the reason I say ittadakimasu 10+ times a day.
K- Kaidama (かいだま) : Extra noodles you can order to put in to your Ramen broth. A good word to know if you go to Shisen Ramen, a chain ramen restaurant.
L- Love Hotel (ラブホテル) : You should know what this is by now.
M- Mata (股) : Literally crotch or groin area but its used to describe the 'Gap'. The 'Gap' being the space between Japanese women's legs that goes all the way up. Cho Sexy!
N- pick any N word and you can say it in Japan!
O-Otsukaresama (お疲れ様) : Kind of like 'Good Job' or 'Thats enough, you worked hard today'. You can say it to anyone or anything that just worked hard.
P- Purikura (プリクラ) : Short for Print Club. An amazing photo both experience for about 400円.
Q- This one is a little difficult seeing as Japanese doesn't have anything like a Q, but how about Kyuuri. It sounds like Q-Lee, and is one of my favorites at kappa-zushi. Its cucumber sushi.
R-Rikimaru (力丸) : A chain izakaya (居酒屋) where everything is 300 yen. The portions are small so you can taste a lot of things. I recommend also getting the Ramune Chu-hai or a Suntory Highball.
S- Seibyou (性病) : STD. Just watch out for these.
T- Tokumori (特盛り) : The special size. This is the largest serving size at Yoshinoya.
U- Ume. (梅) : Japanese plum. It is a popular flavor and used to make umeshu, 梅酒, the greatest liquor ever created.
V- Valentine's Day (バレンタインデー) : Celebrated Feb 14th by women giving expensive chocolate to men. Way better than that BS hallmark holiday in America.
W-Wakewakaranai (訳分からない) : Incomprehensible, that doesn't make sense. You'll need this word if you attempt reading any Engrish.
X-Xenophobia : Fear of that which is different from oneself. Luckily this is dying out in Japan, but you may still find some old fogeys bad mouthing you in Japanese to your face. But they will die soon so the jokes on them...
y-Yu (湯) : Hot water, bath. You can find 'ゆ' signs throughout Japan. The sign indicates a public bath where you can sit and relax. I recommend it (and yes, you have to do it naked).
Z- Ze (ぜ) : A sentence end that basically adds force or makes you sound cooler. Its akin to ending an English sentence in 'yo' or 'bitch', it adds emphasis.
Thats it for now. If you would like to further look up some words/kanji, I recommend Jim Breen. Its pretty helpful - I use it all the time.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
J電車`s Return
Just when I finally thought I could deal without Japan for a while, I decided to tease myself by going back for a week...damn did I miss Japan. I would encourage you all again to visit but the yen is kicking so much ass right now that its probably not the best idea...If you are in Japan for longer than 30 seconds, here are some things you will notice.
-When your plane leaves the terminal, the persons working on the tarmac (actually a term for the material used, not the large paved surface itself - fun fact!) bow to you and wave goodbye. But as cool as this is for foreigners to see, it actually has roots in WWII - the pilots got a nice farewell because they were not coming back....so that's kinda depressing
-when people talk about themselves, they point to their face instead of their chest/heart. Not really sure why this is the way it is, but its kinda cool and I noticed myself doing it unconsciously after only a couple days.
-no matter how hot it is in a mall or train station, nobody takes off their coat. This blows my mind. I think I will take the inconvenience of holding my coat over sweating my 金玉s off. But then again, the Japanese probably evolved beyond sweating and discomfort...
Its also getting close to Valentines Day, so there is a plethora of chocolate goodies being sold in Japan right now. But its a little different than the chocolates you see in America. Department stores selling Hershey kiss sized chocolates for about 300 yen each is typical. Chocolate potato chips, liquor and chocolate beer (yes, beer) are sold in conbinis as well. I have seen enough chocolate in the past few days to last me a lifetime.
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