The art of being オシャレ

Word on the street is that Japan is trying to 'export' its fashion overseas. Stores like Uniqlo are popping up all over the globe, and this is hopefully just the beginning. FYI, Uniqlo has some sweet robes. Japan is finally realizing they have sweet fashion, and they are looking to profit from this. So help me, if Gyaru makes its way to America (and the ladies here drop a few pounds), I might go back to white girls...

Japan making money from its cool?? How sweet would that be? That’s like getting a job eating onigiri senbei or drinking chu-hai. Japan eats, sleeps, and breathes fashion. Its no surprise that Tokyo is one of the top fashion capitols of the freakin WORLD! It comes so naturally to Japan that if they pull this off, it will be amazing.

Unfortunately for Japan, this may be a tall order. If you’ve never been to Japan, the only fashion news you hear about is the weird stuff. Men dressing as maids; the weirdos on harajuku bridge, visual K, Lolita, etc. This kind of fashion is what us foreigners hear about first. I blame that Gwen Stefani tart for tricking us into thinking harajuku fashion is cool. I have 'no doubt' that she is a moron.

Harajuku: Japanese for WTF

If you have been to Japan, you'll know that people who dress like that, are also douches in Japan. There are just as many Japanese people as tourists taking pictures and eye balling the those goth lolitas. You will also notice that everyone in Japan spends more than 5 minutes on getting ready in the morning. I hope Japan exports this little tid bit as well.

Now that I'm done ragging on the odd 'styles', some of the best include:
Gyaru (of course), hippy, anything with stockings, and I can even get behind the latest Yama Garu. These Yama Garu (mountain girls) try to pretty up functional hiking gear and head for the mountains.

Nice! I'll be grabbing my short shorts and heading for the moun...screw it. I'll just take more pictures in Uniqlo...

Baseball

When it comes to baseball, nobody takes this boring game more seriously than Japan. Okay, arguably America is reigning king of boring games, but Japan is a very close second. The Hanshin Tigers get a pretty decent turnout. At the games, it seems like the fans care more about the cheering than the game itself. Go to the games and check it out!! Many fans are too concerned with leading the cheers to even turn around and watch the game. Its wild.

In case you haven't heard, a new lady star has come to the U.S. - 吉田 えり (Yoshida Eri). Please, reserve your knuckle princess jokes. Its no surprise that Japan has another prodigy coming to America. The amount of practice time that those kids put in to sports is disgusting. By disgusting I mean I feel disgusting after watching them practice, because I have never practiced that hard for anything in my life. Some kids throw their arms out at 18 years old. I guess the point here is that this lady could make baseball watchable, so keep your eye out for Yoshida Eri of the Chico Outlaws and her sick knuckle-ball.

Speaking of Movies...

I know that in the US people have been complaining about movie tickets for a while now. Especially when talking about seeing a 3D movie, the tickets can seem expensive. They're even more expensive if you're wasting your extra 3D money on a movie like Clash of the Titans or The Last Airbender...

Anyone want to take a stab at what a movie ticket costs in Japan?? Think really hard and remember that anything you like to do in America is ridiculously expensive in Japan. Here is a list of 'American' things and their prices in Japan. Reading it should give you some time to guess ticket prices.

Driving: $3000 for a license and about $4.25 per gallon of gas.
Pizza: Around $30 to $40 for a large pizza with a few toppings.
Potato Chips: Typically $3+ for a bag half the size of what they sell in American grocery stores.
Beer: About $25 for a 12 pack...if you can find a 12 pack.

Getting the idea? The crap you get used to in America is not exactly popular in Japan, so it gets expensive. People don't typically have pizza delivered in Japan, and potato chips are usually only eaten with friends at some sort of drinking party. There is a heavy tax on Beer which is why many people drink Happoshu, myself included.

As for driving, roads and parking are just not an efficient use of space or energy, so if you want this privilege, you REALLY have to pay for it. Parking in Japan is similar to that of New York, its expensive and just plain difficult to find a space.

So the typical movie price in Japan is......1800 Yen!! Thats $21.50 with today's exchange rate. Add in the fact that the movie is 3D, and that becomes $30 dollars. Insane right?? Most theaters will offer some sort of student discount, but that doesn't knock the price in to the reasonable range by any means. Plus, if you are only traveling to Japan for a few months, there won't be many blockbuster movies out that you haven't already seen. There tends to be a lag time for big American movies to get to Japan, but some exceptions to the rule include Spider-man and I Am Legend which released the same day or earlier than America.

Something interesting to note about movie theaters in Japan, they tend to have cheaper ticket prices in the evening. This is quite the opposite case in America, but one reason is that people don't want to risk catching the last train in Japan, so an earlier movie is better.

So the next time you plan on seeing a movie in Japan....don't. Rent it when it comes out at Tsutaya, save 20 dollars and use that money to go out drinking with some buddies. You know what I always say, you learn more Japanese being blitzed out of your mind than from any movie...

Pictured: Fluency

MOVIES

It's been a little while since I've mentioned some good Japanese movies. That is probably because good current Japanese movies are few and far between (but you can't go wrong with anything by Kurosawa, Beat Takeshi and Studio Ghibli). Here are some goodies from 3 major Japanese movie categories, Action, Drama, and Weird.

Action: Azumi 2 or Ichi. You really only need to watch one of these, cause they are essentially the same movie. Both movies consist of Japanese women killing lots of people with swords. The only difference is that Ichi is blind (fun fact: the japanese word for blind, mekura, is considered kind of rude to say, so you don't hear it often. You typically hear 'me ga mienai'. Translation: eyes can't see)

Drama: Casshern. If you feel like being super depressed and hating all of humanity, watch this movie. Its filmed in the style of 300 but takes place in the future. There is a lot of martial arts and war action, but the story is mainly about how human beings are terrible. I love this movie and the soundtrack is awesome but you just have to be in the mood to watch this sort of thing.

Weird: Revenge of the Zebra Miniskirt Police. Dead or Alive, Visitor Q. If the names alone aren't weird enough, give these movies a try. Dead or alive actually starts like a normal crime/gang movie yet in the end everything falls apart. Visitor Q is something a retired porn star taking LSD might come up with so don't watch this with family.

Now that I've written this I've thought of a few more goodies - so stay tuned for more recommendations.

Japanese Frustration

Part of what makes Japan an amazing country, is the fact that it has become so technologically advanced and industrialized while maintaining much of its culture and traditional values.
However, at times this becomes incredibly frustrating to witness, especially when you come from a country that has thrown traditional values out the window and every idiot can speak their mind (that was meant to be a compliment to America).

Here are some examples to help explain what I'm talking about.
Some friends and I stopped in at a Yoshinoya in Nanba before a night of awesome. I saw that they sold Kimchi-don (a beef and rice bowl with kimchi on top), so I knew they had kimchi and rice, and we asked if I could just have a kimchi and rice bowl. That is a reasonable request by American standards, but apparently not by Japanese standards. They said no, even when I said I would pay the price of a normal kimchi-don.

Here's another example. In America (and in my mind) drug use is not that big of a deal. I don't mean that getting strung out on heroine or cocaine is cool, I just mean that its possible for someone to try drugs and still be a good person. Everything in moderation. In Japan, I've found that people look down on users like they are the scum of the earth. That is just a tad bit hypocritical coming from people with such a large smoking population and drinking culture...and a growing population with aids...it doesn't sound like they have their priorities straight, does it? A recent study estimates drug use at just 2.9% of the Japanese population . For comparison, in 2007, 8% of persons 12 years of age and over in America had used illicit drugs in the past month. Japan really hates drugs. Meanwhile California loves drugs but they just can't leave their bongs long enough to go vote on the issue...

Last, but certainly not least, is the excuse of tradition. When I asked why people in Shiga still make nasty fermented fish that tastes disgusting for 1000 years, the response I got was 'its tradition'. For those of you that have seen The Cove, the dolphin kill is an age old tradition as well, but I will have to elaborate on that at a later date. Apparently it doesn't matter if the tradition is gross, outdated, or barbaric. The fact that its tradition is all the justification needed to continue year after year. Seriously, trying to get an answer more detailed than 'its tradition' from a Japanese person is like pulling teeth...from a dolphin while its getting stabbed repeatedly in the face.

I love Japan, and I know the reason Japan has such a rich and beautiful culture is because they stick to their traditions with such conviction. I just wish that sometimes they would let the dumb traditions slide...

The Man Bag

Thank you Japan for giving me something I once thought was only for gay Europeans - the Man Bag. Seriously, thanks! I can't believe it has taken me so long to write about this, but I guess I've become so accustomed to it I forgot it was 'different' in America.

Many guys wear 'man bags' in Japan. This probably comes from the need to carry your stuff around all day since nobody drives. They are also quite cool looking, so it makes me wonder if people carry them cause they're cool, or if they are designed to be cool because people need to use them....deep stuff.

Here are a few examples. ONE TWO THREE

These are not to be confused with backpacks. Backpacks are for 10 year old kids and tourists. Unless you plan on doing some hiking in Japan, avoid backpacks. If you plan on getting a man bag, shop around, because they are common enough to have a million different styles, colors, and prices. If the price is too high (like just about everything is in Japan) then take a short trip to Korea. I got a pretty sweet knockoff over there for about 30 bucks.

Are you browsing for man bags yet? Do you need more convincing? If you had a man bag, it would be that much easier to sneak in a bottle of Suntory in to the Karaoke room. With plenty of room left over for your Fit's gum!