The Customer is Always God

Words cannot possibly express how pain free it is shopping in Japan. 

You know those times when you really need some assistance but the staff are nowhere to be found?  Or when you need to check out in a hurry but nobody seems to feel like working in a hurry?  You know what shopping in a Wal-Mart feels like?  That kind of crap doesn't happen in Japan.  (Just don't try to exchange anything or bend the rules, because no matter how nice they want to be, they won't break the rules for you)

I don't think it's necessarily that Japanese people are better than everyone else...okay, that's a lie.  I don't think they are so much genetically superior as I believe that their culture encourages working as a team and being a productive member of society rather than an independent narcissist who only cares about themselves...so yes, Japanese are better people.  Where was I going with this??

Oh yes, shopping in Japan is like visiting a strip club.  Everyone is super nice and attractive, but in the end it is a business.  But also like a strip club, it doesn't really matter why you are getting magnificent service. Whether the staff really want to be nice or sleep with you is irrelevant. You will be treated like 神様 regardless. 

Even the vending machines in Japan treat their customers with the utmost respect.  Not only do they work ALL the time, but I've never even had to try more than once to put my money into the machine.  None of that creasing your bills on the side of the vending machine nonsense in Japan!  Even though vending machines are SUPER convenient, I still prefer to interact with human beings...partly because its difficult to practice Japanese with a machine, but mostly because Japanese girls are way more attractive than vending machines. 

Last time I went to Colorful in Kobe looking for a Japanese Snuggie and some Yamazaki 12 year I got world class treatment.  And not that patronizing 'you're a foreigner so lets be extra nice to him because he's probably lost' treatment, this was the real deal...Or as real as 5 star treatment can be coming from a staff member being paid to be helpful.  Am I being bitter now?  Seriously, somebody tell me, I don't even know anymore...At least I have a Japanese Snuggie.

I don't joke about things like that.