Backwards Japan

Let’s face it, Japan is bassackwards. Rules that govern life in America, and the rest of the world, generally don’t apply in Japan. America is getting fatter while Japan is getting skinnier. The dollar is getting weaker while the yen gets stronger. You are probably aware of these already, so let me hit you with some knowledge about the less well known “rules” that Japan doesn’t know how to follow.

Construction workers get chicks, while wearing parachute pants. Think I'm joking about the parachute pants?

I was not.

That alone tends to exclude you from contact with women outside of a 80’s throwback party. Seriously though, Japanese construction workers get the best women. The most dolled up, gorgeous chicks are joined to these tan, Japanese MC Hammer lookalikes. I believe a lot of it has to do with Japanese construction works have muscles and tans, which are quite the opposite of the average Japanese guy.

Houses typically drop in value. Housing in Japan is a bit different, to say the least. First of all. there is little space for them. Secondly, they generally are not designed to last. Japan is constantly growing up, and expanding while natural disasters tear it down. There is just no
point in trying to design a house that will last more than a decade. Much like cars in America, houses tend to depreciate in value rather quickly (I'm not saying they are cheap, they just don't retain their value very well). I’ve seen many cases where houses are simply torn down and rebuilt, because it’s cheaper than renovating.

Crime and drug use is low while AIDS is high. Japan is very good at getting the ‘drugs are bad’ propaganda out there, but strangely silent when it comes to sex education. It may just be my experiences, but I know several Japanese girls who actually started having sex before knowing how you get pregnant. Most of these fine young ladies lost their virginity around 13. This is a combination of the Japanese tradition of not talking about anything real, and old people running the government. If there is one thing old people are good at, its amnesia. All those old folks seem to think they grew up just fine, but they obviously didn’t because...

I don't get it.

This is a pretty big issue. If I received any good advice upon arriving at Kansai Gaidai, it was to WRAP IT UP. Plus, being on the pill is still kind of taboo in Japan (but its getting better), so its not worth the risk of having some slant eyed versions of yourself running around Japan.

Before I completely scare you, there is a trend lately of Japanese women getting so skinny that they stop having their period. Yes, Japanese women are frail, beautiful, and probably can't have kids. Perfect, right??